Gavin Newsom Urged to Take it Easy, Stop Talking So Much

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Gavin Newsom has been urged to keep a low profile...
On Gavin Newsom's recent book tour, Stephen Colbert noted that our lieutenant governor's tome ought to come with a "bullshit translator" and added that all of Newsom's trite Newsomisms should be "carved on a stone and put in someone's garden."

Put that one on your back cover.

Writing a book was just the latest diversion keeping our erstwhile mayor from his current day job (and he wasn't always so enthused about running San Francisco, either). And, now that he's ostensibly sitting on the big chair while Gov. Jerry Brown ambles through China, government-watchers have a bit of advice for Newsom: Keep it up.

"The best thing he can do as acting governor is nothing," Claremont McKenna College political scientist Jack Pitney told the Associated Press. Considering Newsom's aversion to Sacramento, his short-lived television show, his book, and its resultant book tour -- this is a mission he is eminently qualified to fulfill.

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Gavin Newsom Says the Year for Marijuana Legalization in California Is 2016

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Now you have a friend in the marijuana business
As the most powerful man in the room milled aimlessly about the bar of the United Irish Cultural Center on Friday, looking for someone who recognized him as United States Congressman, all the attention was focused where it always is whenever Gavin Newsom is in the room: right on the lieutenant governor himself.

Newsom was at the Instituto Laboral de la Raza award dinner hawking copies of his new book, Citizenville, and doing what he does best -- looking good. In addition to the labor leaders and elected officials stepping forward for a moment of his time, Gavin's ear was repeatedly bent by one of the labor movement's fastest-growing segments: the medical marijuana industry.

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Matt Cain's Perfect Game: Gavin Newsom's Tweet Might Have Lost Him the L.A. Vote

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Well played, Gavin
Like with every big happening in the world these days, Matt Cain's perfect game -- the first in Giants history -- sent Twitter into an immediate, topic-saturating flutter. The magnitude of which we haven't seen since ... Manny Pacquiao dominated got screwed by corrupt/blind judges against Tim Bradley on Saturday.

Of course it wouldn't be a true Tweevent without participation from Lt. Gov. Gavin Newsom himself -- the man named "America's Most Social Mayor" in 2010 --  who, in his last year as San Francisco's mayor, had more Twitter followers (1.4 million) than even Newark's Cory Booker (1.1 million). The New York Times dubbed him "the Twitter Prince" before gushing, "If only the Twitterverse had polling places. Forget this lieutenant governor business -- @gavinnewsom could run for president."

So at 10:17 p.m. yesterday, several minutes after Joaquin Arias zipped that sweet final out to Brandon Belt, @gavinnewsom tweeted: "No matter who your team is, all CA celebrating #MattCain tonite! First perfecto in #Giants history!"

Apparently, the lite gov doesn't know any Dodger fans.

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Gavin Newsom's TV Debut Imminent: Flee While You Can

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The horror. The horror.
A public safety notice on SFGate today warned the general public of potential exposure to former San Franciscan Gavin Newsom's imminent television debut. Per the warning, our erstwhile mayor and apparently bored silly lieutenant governor will on May 18 commence chatting with "stars" such as Lance Armstrong, Oliver Stone, and Paypal and Tesla founder Elon Musk.

Perhaps most alarmingly, however, Newsom will be allotted a segment titled "Just Gavin," in which he will "discuss his views on the issues of the day."

This is an ominous development. Newsom's good looks would put him in the running to host even a farm report -- but Current TV is giving a platform to the man who, not four years ago, loosed upon the general public a 7.5-hour State of the City YouTube address.

For those who actually subjected themselves to that ordeal, the thought of -- voluntarily! -- tuning in to watch Newsom pontificate, nod at Camera 2, or "discuss his views on the issues of the day" is an offer akin to a chain gang reunion back at the ol' work farm. 

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Gavin Newsom's House Sells

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It's official: Newsom's out
Lieutenant Governor Gavin Newsom can no longer play coy about whether he is or is not a resident of San Francisco. According to news reports, the former San Francisco mayor's house has officially sold, which means he is officially no longer a denizen of our fair city.

So does this mean the Marin-bound Newsom will be booted from the local Democratic Party? As you might recall Aaron Peskin, chair of the Democratic Party and Newsom's political nemesis, had questioned whether the lieutenant governor was still living here, because if not, Newsom could no longer be a member of the local Democratic County Central Committee.

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Gavin Newsom's House Hits the Market

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Where's Gavin now?
The big question for Lieutenant Governor Gavin Newsom has been: Where does the ex-mayor live? Until today, we couldn't say for sure what his living situation was. While some news reports say the Newsoms have packed up their home and moved to Ross for the summer, his staff was insisting he's still a resident of San Francisco.

To be clear, Newsom does live in Ross and he technically is still a resident of our fair city -- but not for long, it seems. What we can tell you is that his Ashbury Heights home is on the market -- officially, according to Socketsite.com, a real estate blog.

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Gavin Newsom's Home Is Plenty Big, Realtors Say

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Russell Lee, WPA photographer, 1939
Now that's a tiny house...
Former Mayor Gavin Newsom's claim that a four-bedroom, $2.7 million Ashbury Heights home is too petite for a family of four induced bouts of hilarity among San Francisco's real estate professionals.

"Oh, I think we all giggled when we saw the pretense behind it," Realtor Luba Muzichenko says. "This is a little ostentatious. When he was running for mayor he was trying to pretend he was very down-to-earth."

Well, Newsom can still boast that he uses the cheapest hair gel there is.

"I can tell you that I'm raising a family of four -- and my kids are a lot further along than his -- in a 2,600-square-foot condo in NOPA. And it's awesome," Realtor Mollie Poe says. "San Francisco is a wonderful place to raise kids, and there are a lot of kids in that neighborhood he's moving out of. Who can't raise a family of four in a house that size?"

 

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So Long, Gavin Newsom

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Where's Gavin? Good question.
It doesn't come as a surprise that Gavin Newsom, who made every effort to get out of San Francisco short of mailing himself to parts unknown, is leaving town. What's unexpected is he couldn't come up with a better excuse. Apparently, the Newsom's $2.7 million abode isn't large enough to accommodate a family of four.

Four what? Rhinoceri?

We suppose $2.7 mil just don't buy what it used to. Either that or the plans to install a squash court for the wee ones was just no longer feasible after the installation of the monorail. And, really, who puts in a squash court without a monorail? It's just not done.

We placed a call to an expert in moving one's family out of town after being elected to represent it. Surprisingly, former Supervisor Chris Daly was sympathetic to his despised rival's plight.

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Newsom Mania Comes to an End

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Now that Gavin Newsom has finally cut the cord and left San Francisco, one can only wonder how long it will be before we see his face on TV again.

It's been well-stated that for such an ambitious politician, Newsom landed a politically impotent position as California's lieutenant governor. And as a reporter who trailed the mayor for a year, it's hard to imagine how San Francisco's celebrity politician is coping without the one thing that truly makes him thrive: the media.

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Gavin Newsom Goes Back On His Word To Avoid Back Room Deals

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After winning the seat for lieutenant governor in November, Mayor Gavin Newsom told reporters, point blank, that there would be no back room deals or political bargaining when selecting an interim mayor to fill the remainder of his term.

He's also vowed to steer a clean-cut transition as he assumed his role as state lieutenant governor.

But then it seems Newsom was involved in back room shenanigans late last night when city supervisors took a short break from debating who should be the interim mayor.

And his effort for a smooth city transition? Well, that's been about as clean as Mission Street sidewalk.

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