Ouija Board: John Avalos Claims He Was Joking About Contacting Harvey Milk's Spirit

The subset of the population convinced that San Francisco is a government of the lunatics, by the lunatics, and for the lunatics was handed a cookie today. The San Francisco Chronicle reported that, in deciding how to vote on a resolution urging the christening of a Navy ship after slain Supervisor Harvey Milk, Supervisor John Avalos consulted the occult.

Avalos et al. "actually put our hands on the Ouija board and the letters g-o-o-d-r-i-d-d-a-n-c-e-d-a-d-t came out," reported the paper. "We asked Harvey, and Harvey gave us these letters: Good riddance Don't Ask, Don't Tell. It was quite clear that Harvey Milk would have been opposed to Don't Ask, Don't Tell. I can honestly say that's one aspect of this resolution that's really valid.''

A simple Google search notes that a great many news outlets took Avalos' claims at face value. He tells SF Weekly, however, this was "a joke" and "a total farce."

Reporters "all believed my Ouija board communicated with Harvey and he said 'g-o-o-d-r-i-d-d-a-n-c-e-d-a-d-t'? Your colleagues think that shit's real?" queried the supe.

Avalos insists this was entirely a jest -- he never consulted an Ouija board, and doesn't even own one (he speculates the "great comix/game shop on Divis" might be a good place to buy one, however).

The supervisor claims this joke was meant to "playfully make fun" of his colleagues for their earnest attempts to figure out what Milk might have actually wanted with regards to placing his name on a ship -- an answer Avalos feels "no one can know." In the end, Avalos voted in favor of the nonbinding resolution, as he felt naming a ship after the openly gay supe "would be useful in making it easier to serve in the military if you're gay, and [it'd be good] having an ambassador with Harvey's name on it throughout the world."

Avalos concluded that he was surprised his "stupid joke" became a national story. "I thought the whole resolution was a tempest in a teapot. Jeez!"

He continued to insist that his joke, however, was funny -- though "the delivery wasn't as good as it coulda been."

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Patrick Connors
Patrick Connors

Everything John Avalos says is music to my ears. 

And Ouija board denial or not, I'm still planning on having him over for a slumber party so we can contact Donna Summer in the great beyond.

I might stay up all night watching him sleep.....sigh.....

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