"Exotic," "Lusty, Busty": SJ Merc Explores Mirkarimi Trial's Sexy Angle

Categories: Sexytime
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Still a Mirky Dreamy for some
The saga of Ross Mirkarimi and his bruised wife Eliana Lopez is making the rounds coast-to-coast today, with an Associated Press report on the San Francisco sheriff's trial on domestic abuse charges appearing in hundreds of media outlets around the country.

Mirkarimi's trial was to begin with opening arguments tomorrow; as opposing lawyers wrangle over whether to allow in court video evidence showing Lopez's arm with a bruise Mirkarimi allegedly put there, the trial's beginning may wait another week.

By this point, with this story in the news continuously for two months, there's not much ground to break. The AP, with its coverage, went the South American angle, writing about Lopez's Spanish-language parenting blog and saying how her history as a soap opera actress gives the proceedings "drama."

That left unexplored depths for the San Jose Mercury News to plumb. And plumb the South Bay paper did: onetime political dreamboat Mirkarimi has "the swarthy good looks of a rakish pirate," the newspaper declared today. And Lopez? She's "lusty" and "busty," and "says 'come hither' with a Spanish accent," the newspaper reported.

Then again, this is San Jose, the land of topless coffee shops, so maybe this is typical.

The paper is among the first in recent memory to dub Lopez, whom Mirkarimi met at an environmental conference in 2008 in Brazil while he was flush from international publicity for his plastic bag ban, a "trophy wife."

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Lopez

That's not really her reputation in local political circles: it was more of a "oh, that happened" rushed union, as Lopez and Mirkarimi wed following her pregnancy with the couple's 2-year old son, Theo.

Mirkarimi, 50, has been charged with three misdemeanors stemming from an alleged Dec. 31 incident in which he grabbed Lopez's arm during an argument. The sheriff has been barred from seeing his wife since January and can see his son for only two hours a day.

The video material in question was filmed by the couple's neighbor on Webster Street, Ivory Madison. The video was shot in case the couple should fight over Theo in a custody battle, and was "scripted and directed" by Madison, according to court filings.

And oh, what could have been had things not turned out this way, the Merc whispers: "Together they could have been perfect models for the paperback cover of a bodice ripper."

Mirkarimi as Fabio? That'll get the moderates going.

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Patrick Connors
Patrick Connors

I know who took that picture of Ross drinking his testosterone laced cup of tea!!

ME!

Sexytime indeed...xxoo

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