Barry Bonds Trial: A Lesson in Human Anatomy

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Most of us found federal prosecutors' decision to present evidence of former Giants slugger Barry Bonds' allegedly shrunken testicles a bit gauche. Granted, the size of Bonds' balls is relevant: The government hopes to prove that he used performance-enhancing steroids that diminished his private parts, and thus committed perjury when he told a grand jury in 2003 that he didn't take the drug.

Well, the natural (or, as prosecutors allege in Bonds' case, not-so-natural) shocks the flesh is heir to are again influencing proceedings in the ballplayer's trial. The eighth day of testimony before U.S. District Court Judge Susan Illston was postponed because of a juror's health problems with kidney stones. It's not yet clear when courtroom proceedings will resume.

The pause comes at a consequential juncture in Bonds' trial. Prosecutors say that over the weekend they discovered an audiotape of Bonds' former business partner discussing his steroid use with Dr. Arthur King. Such a tape could counter assertions Ting made on the witness stand last week that such conversations did not take place.

Defense attorneys for Bonds are arguing the tape should not be admitted as evidence.

To sum up, the Bonds case has gone from balls to breasts (Bonds ex-girlfriend testified last week that he had threatened to cut out her bosom implants) to kidneys in a couple of weeks. The trial is supposed to wrap up soon, but who knows what other aspects of human anatomy could have their day in court before then?

Follow us on Twitter at @SFWeekly and @TheSnitchSF

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