World Series: Make Your Best 'Walker, Texas Ranger' Jokes. But Make 'Em Fast.
Categories: Sports
The San Francisco Giants are not running on all cylinders. They are running on cylinders we didn't even know they had.
If you're even a marginal fan, you know the story. After last night's brilliant and bizarre 9-0 victory, San Francisco heads deep into the heart of Texas with a two games to nil lead. The Giants have outscored the Rangers 20-7. You know teams that have taken the first two games of the Series win just under 80 percent of the time. You know how quickly things can change. You know this stuff. What you may not know is -- what the hell am I going to do with myself for the next few games?
For Giants fans, the pull between hubris and paranoia is overpowering. Things literally couldn't be going better -- unless you're Jose Guillen. But things have gone well for San Francisco before. They didn't end well.
Yet maybe this year is different. Even the most rational fans watching last night's game may have settled upon Divine Intervention as the rationale for Ian Kinsler's shot to center field hitting the top of the fence -- and bouncing back, neatly, right into Andres Torres' glove. It seems likely the Giants kept Guillen off the postseason roster not because he was injured, or slumping, or the slowest mammal on the continent -- but because of his ties to a Human Growth Hormone probe. Guillen's replacement was Cody Ross. How'd that go?
The Baseball Gods have favored the Giants. But the Baseball Gods are fickle. Will the Texas Rangers anger the Baseball Gods by having both George Bushes throw out the first pitch before Game 3? We'll just have to wait and see.
But the Giants, unlike W., know better than to print up a "Mission Accomplished" banner when much work remains to be done.
Follow us on Twitter at @TheSnitchSF and @SFWeekly
If you're even a marginal fan, you know the story. After last night's brilliant and bizarre 9-0 victory, San Francisco heads deep into the heart of Texas with a two games to nil lead. The Giants have outscored the Rangers 20-7. You know teams that have taken the first two games of the Series win just under 80 percent of the time. You know how quickly things can change. You know this stuff. What you may not know is -- what the hell am I going to do with myself for the next few games?
For Giants fans, the pull between hubris and paranoia is overpowering. Things literally couldn't be going better -- unless you're Jose Guillen. But things have gone well for San Francisco before. They didn't end well.
Yet maybe this year is different. Even the most rational fans watching last night's game may have settled upon Divine Intervention as the rationale for Ian Kinsler's shot to center field hitting the top of the fence -- and bouncing back, neatly, right into Andres Torres' glove. It seems likely the Giants kept Guillen off the postseason roster not because he was injured, or slumping, or the slowest mammal on the continent -- but because of his ties to a Human Growth Hormone probe. Guillen's replacement was Cody Ross. How'd that go?
The Baseball Gods have favored the Giants. But the Baseball Gods are fickle. Will the Texas Rangers anger the Baseball Gods by having both George Bushes throw out the first pitch before Game 3? We'll just have to wait and see.
But the Giants, unlike W., know better than to print up a "Mission Accomplished" banner when much work remains to be done.
Follow us on Twitter at @TheSnitchSF and @SFWeekly
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