Tax Day Freebies Mostly for Crap You Can't Get in San Francisco

Not around here, he didn't...

​We're always a little wary about publicizing companies' free giveaway schemes -- it is, essentially, free advertising. But, hey, if you folks get a free taco out of it, fair's fair.

And yet a number of local Web sites and TV stations have publicized Tax Day giveaways for institutions you'd have to hop on a plane or drive like Steve McQueen to reach by the end of the day. It doesn't make much sense to expend hundreds of dollars to garner a free snack worth a dollar and a quarter -- and now it's too late to write it off for fiscal 2009.

First of all, yes, if you tote a "reusable tumbler" into Starbucks today, you can get a free cup of Joe. There's a Starbucks on every corner here; the Yellow Pages list 77 addresses within San Francisco's borders.* Like spiders and mice, you're always near a Starbucks.

You're not always near a Dunkin' Donuts, however. While many East Coasters have an inordinate fondness for the chain's coffee -- which is great for mediocre coffee -- you won't find a Dunkin' in any of the major cities of this state. Just as well; they're only giving away free donuts in Vegas this year, anyway. What happens in Vegas...

San Franciscans also aren't benefiting from any giveaways at Cinnabon, as there aren't any Cinnabons in this city. If you really must get a free cinnamon roll, you can always head to Daly City, though.

Finally, you can't get any "ice cream pizza" at MaggieMoo's, because the nearest one appears to be in Clovis.

Ice cream pizza? Pity the poor people of Clovis.

*An earlier version of this story noted that Starbucks' Web site doesn't have a store locater. Well, it does.