SF Gov InAction: By 2050 You Will Be Happier, Lose Weight, and Experience a Massive Economic Recovery, If You Do What the Peak Oil Task Force tells you to RIGHT NOW!

 

 

Monday, Sept. 21

11 a.m. - Public Safety Committee

 

Eight supervisors -- the magic number -- have sponsored a bill allowing the police chief to select any qualified law enforcement official, from in or out of the department, for senior non-civil service position in the San Francisco Police Department.

It hits Public Safety Committee today, and since all three members of the Public Safety Committee (Mirkarimi, Alioto-Pier, and Chiu) are co-sponsors of the bill, one expects it to sail through committee like a ... like a ... well, I don't actually know any "sailing" metaphors. But like a thing that sails, on a day that is ideal for sailing, in a place that offers optimum sailing conditions.

Like that.

I have to say I'm extremely impressed with the unexpected turns the famously insular SFPD is taking. Conventional wisdom was that there was no way in hell the new chief would be from outside the SFPD -- but the new chief is from outside the SFPD. Conventional wisdom said that there was no way the new chief would be able to choose his own top aides -- yet now that seems inevitable. And Chief George Gascon's proposal to clear the civilian oversight board's decks of a massive backlog of cases by distinguishing those that can get a slap-on-the-wrist from those where termination is warranted strikes me as as good a compromise as one is likely to find in an imperfect world.

Sometimes the world conspires to impress you. Ladies and gentlemen, please keep up the good work.

Also on the agenda for today is the usual "let's look at citywide crime levels," now sponsored by the committee's new chair, David Chiu. Needless to say, if it's sponsored by David Chiu, it's going to be extra special. Maybe there will even be a special guest! I hear Paula Abdul is free.

 

1 p.m. - Land Use & Economic Development Committee

Speaking of agenda items that have become old hat no matter who's sponsoring them, David Chiu has another "slap down interim zoning moratoriums on new head shops" proposal. This week the lucky neighborhood is the Polk Street Neighborhood Commercial District. We've gotten so many of these zoning moratoriums in the last year-and-a-half that I can't help but wonder: Does San Francisco really have a limitless appetite for "tobacco" paraphernalia? Because at some point, theoretically, wouldn't we reach a number of head shops to great for the market to bear ... at which point, wouldn't people stop opening them?

Classical economic theory says so: eventually the number of head shops San Francisco wants, and the number of head shops San Francisco has, will match thanks to the market's creeeeeeepy invisible hand.

(Did you know that the invisible hand of the free market is also a registered sex offender? True story. That's why capitalism's not allowed within 1,000 feet of a school, church, or government building.)

But San Francisco seems to defy classical economic theory once again: Apparently an infinite number of head shops are actually sustainable in S.F., forcing the Supervisors to take the heroic action of the past year. Seriously, if they hadn't jumped on this bandwagon there would be a head shop inside a Starbucks inside your apartment right now. And you'd be listening to Bob Marley.

So, thank you Supervisors for protecting us from ourselves once again.

The disbursement of street artist space is also on the agenda today, as is a measure to change the official sidewalk widths at 20th, Minnesota, and Indiana streets zzzzzzzzzzzzz ....

Zzzzzzzz...

What? I'M AWAKE! I was just talking about Chris Daly's proposal to clarify that the SoMa Stabilization Extortion ... er, fund payment, I meant "fund payment" ... fee is "due before issuance of the final certificate of occupancy or within a time certain after the issuance of a first certificate of occupancy, whichever is sooner." That's important to know.

Tuesday, Sept. 22, 2 p.m. - Full Board of Supervisors

This is a really short meeting this week: perhaps the shortest Board Meeting I've yet seen. Was there a federal holiday last week that I forgot about? Or have we all just run out of bullshit to legislate?

Of the 13 items on the agenda .... Ohhhhhh, unlucky number! .... one is the proposal by both the Mayor and the Progressives to create a "Citizen's Committee on Community Development" that will make recommendations on community development strategy and CDBG grants.

Part of me thinks "Yes! This will really empower citizen participation in the future development of San Francisco!" But the part of me that remembers how stuff works thinks "Fuck all: another committee to issue reports that no one but me and Melissa Griffin read."

This is no good. I'm trying to read more novels. Note to the Supervisors: Could you attach an amendment to this bill requiring that all reports by the Citizen's Committee on Community Development must be written as a novel? Preferably something around 250 pages, with a strong minority female protagonist?

No vampires or anything "genre" like that -- and please no narrowly concealed autobiographies. I really don't want to have to read a novelized report about a handsome mayor, Navin Gewsom, who just had a daughter named "Dakota" and is trying desperately to save his (unnamed) state. I know that will be tempting, because it just might secure you a spot on the coveted Board of Appeals No. 2, but please, have some pride.

Another measure on the agenda comes from Chris Daly, who wants to generate $22 million through the sale of mortgage revenue bonds to renovate multi-family rental housing units for people of low-to-moderate income.

The housing in question would be developed by "Mercy Housing XL," at 472 - 480 Ellis Street, a 153-rental housing unit called "The Arlington Project."

I have no idea if this is a good idea, or a good project, or not. But the fact that Chris Daly is appearing as the bill's only sponsor suggests potential trouble in do-gooder town. Does anybody out there want to co-sponsor a $22 million project to renovate 153 low-income units? If not, is that a sign?

The bonds could happen, but maybe Daly and the Guardian should start arguing now about who screwed this one up, just to get ahead of the curve.

Finally, Bevan Dufty has an already well-publicized proposal "encouraging" the new owner of radio station 92.7 to keep the station gay as a Broadway cast party. Or, as Bevan's proposal says "to continue with the Community/Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender/Dance radio format that has made Energy 92.7 one of the most unique and popular radio stations in San Francisco and the Bay Area."

(Sigh). I'm with you in spirit, Bevan; but I fear that anyone who buys an LGBT-themed radio station in San Francisco, and straightens it out, isn't exactly waiting on pins and needles to hear what the city council has to say.

Just a theory.

Now if they want to open a head shop ... then you've got some leverage.