SF Gov InAction: In S.F. Math, 2 + 2 Does Not Equal Four, But Sexual Harrassment = $90,670.20

Here is the exact moment when covering San Francisco government goes from sad to pathetic: It's when you come home after a nice vacation, dust off your lap-top to catch up on what you've missed, and realize that San Francisco has no idea how many working fire engines it has.

I'm pretty sure that if we were a real city, with a functioning government, this kind of thing wouldn't happen.

I would, in fact, like to use this as a defense against all those who claim that my coverage of San Francisco government is too harsh, too cynical, and too mean: We don't know how many reserve fire engines we have.

Or when our rec centers are supposed to be open.

Or how much city cash our mayor spends on his security detail.

Or how many cash transactions at the Marina Yacht Club Harbor went unreported because it didn't have a system for recording them.

Yes, we are progressive and far-sighted. Yes, we would like to pass legislation leading to a sustainable global economy, whereas small towns in the Midwest would like to build more subdivisions.

On the other hand, small towns in the Midwest know how many functioning reserve fire engines they have.

How do we manage to keep thinking we're ahead of the rest of the country? It boggles the mind.

On that note, here's the rest of this week's government meetings, filled with good intentions, signifying nothing.


Monday, Sept. 14, 10:30 a.m. - City Operations & Neighborhood Services Committee

There are just three items on the agenda. Three, incidentally, is a "magic number" in many cultures. So I'm sure these measures will all be very special. They may even have religious significance. If it helps, you can think of them as the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost.

First up is a measure to accept and spend an $11 million federal grant for airport safety projects.

(A very rough internet translation of this bill into Latin -- the official language of holy stuff West of the Baltics -- is "Primoris sursum est a postulo ut recipero quod prodigo an million foedero tribuo pro airport salus exertus.")

Last up is a hearing to consider a liquor license for 533 Sutter Street.

(rough Latin translation: Permaneo sursum est a auditurus esse recolo a liquidus licentia pro Sutter Vicus.)

Crammed into the middle is the most interesting of the three: a measure sponsored by the mayor, Chris Daly, John Avalos, and Ross Mirkarimi ...

... let's just let that sink in for a little while ...

... to establish a "Citizen's Committee on Community Development." (Civis Trado in Defero aedificium)

Interestingly, for purposes of this committee (according to the statute), "community development" means a "planned effort or program that increases the capacity of low-and moderate-income people to improve their quality of life."

That's fine with me, but I'm pretty sure that's not the actual definition of "community development" used by most people around the world -- in English, Latin, or even Sanskrit.

This new committee comes out of the mayor's announcement earlier this year that he's merging the Office of Community Investment with the Office of Economic and Workforce Development. Avalos convened a "working group" to study how exactly that merger would work, and the working group recommended a committee to handle issues caused by the merger.

You see.

The result will either be a new powerhouse in San Francisco development fights that everyone wants a piece of, or one more committee that no one ever listens to. Only time, and another working group, will tell.