Advice: When You Can't Be Naked, Get Creative

By Andy Wright Fri., Jul. 24 2009 at 3:15 PM

Categories: WTF?

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Getting nude on California beaches may no longer be as carefree a pursuit as it once was. A 30-year-old policy allowing people to sunbathe on state beaches in the buff with minimal intervention from law enforcement was recently overturned by the courts. Federal parks, like Baker Beach, won't be affected but other nearby parks will -- including Gray Whale Cove and Red Rock Beach. The Naturist Action Committee is appealing, but we must prepare for the worst. Have no fear, Bay Area nudists. We're here to help. Because that's what we do. Here's a list of ways to feel almost as nude as you used to.

1. Adam and Eve Costume
It was good enough for the first humans on the planet and it's good enough for you. Also, these costumes have the added benefit of reminding others that the reason Adam and Eve first donned their fig leaves was because of shame. Sort of like the shame The Man wants you to feel about your perfect, unique naked body.

2. Hand Bra
It's just like being naked, but with someone holding your boobs.

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