Do You Think Big Tobacco Is a Bunch of Rotten, Death-Dealing Bastards? Well, Survey Says You're Probably Not a Smoker.

Categories: Health
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G.B. Trudeau
Dislike tobacco industry shills? That's a good sign for your lungs.
A U.C. San Francisco study has revealed that young adults who deeply believe that the tobacco industry is composed of low-down, degenerate, gutless, slimy, watermelon-fucking sons of bitches are far less likely to smoke than their colleagues with less malevolent feelings toward Big Tobacco.

While this seems like the ultimate no-brainer, UCSF scientists say the data reveals a lot; this, they claim, is the first study to ever link interviewees' attitudes toward the tobacco industry to 18-to-25-year-olds' actual behavior. Depending upon young adults' responses to queries like "Taking a stand against smoking is important to me" or "I would like to see cigarette companies go out of business," researchers claim those with strongly anti-tobacco sentiments are only one-third as likely to smoke as their more wishy-washy companions. Those who do smoke -- but badmouth the industry -- are four times more likely to seriously contemplate quitting than blasé respondents.

The findings -- published this month in the American Journal of Preventative Medicine -- give ammo to those who'd like to see Big Tobacco targeted as a bunch of heartless bastards in advocacy commercials and pamphlets -- instead of the traditional approach that merely emphasizes cigarette-smoking will lead to your slow and painful death. 

"Running anti-tobacco ads to expose the fact that the tobacco industry kills five million people worldwide annually turns out to be hugely successful in preventing and promoting cessation," said Professor Stanton Glantz, a study co-author and professor of medicine and director of UCSF's Center for Tobacco Control Research and Education.

The study's lead author, Dr. Pamela Ling, actually felt her data could be used to argue that existing anti-smoking ads targeting the tobacco industry are already working.

Finally, it warrants mentioning that the study was funded in part by the Flight Attendant Medical Research Institute -- because such an organization exists. You are now free to demonize the tobacco industry -- BING!

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