Like Football? Good at Glad-Handing? Want a Boss Who Enjoys Dropping His Pants in Crowds? Come Work For the 49ers!
Do you have a degree in journalism? Do you have at least eight years as a public relations professional? Are you a skilled public speaker? And do you enjoy working around men who disrobe in front of the media and are led by a man who disrobed in front of them?
Well then what are you waiting for? The San Francisco 49ers need a new director of football public relations -- could it be you? Apply here!
The first three questions heading this article are noted on the job application form. The one about disrobing will likely be asked behind closed doors. Also worth querying: Are you discrete? One of the prior holders of this job, Kirk Reynolds, made headlines of the wrong sort in 2005 when a video he'd produced in-house was leaked to the general public -- who couldn't help but notice the broad, fratboy-esque homosexual jokes and Niners trainer George Chung wearing giant buck teeth, speaking in a Most Honorable Houseboy accent, and claiming his name is "Suck Hung."
So, don't do that. The 49ers are a class organization.