This, right here, is the best thing we've seen all week: French bakers have responded to Kanye West's lyrics in "I Am a God," wherein he memorably raps, "In a French-ass restaurant/Hurry up with my damn croissants." And the French bakers have politely -- and with tongues firmly in cheek -- urged Yeezy to settle the fuck down and wait for his precious baked goods. From their letter, via Billboard:
Yeezy's croissants will not be rushed, say the French.
The croissant is dignified -- not vulgar like a piece of toast, simply popped into a mechanical device to be browned. No -- the croissant is born of tender care and craftsmanship ... This process, as you can understand, takes much time. And we implore the patience of all those who order croissants. You may be familiar with the famous French expression, "A great croissant is worth waiting a lifetime for.
Putting voice to a question we've all had, this spokesperson for the Association of French Bakers further asks West whether, "as a deity, you can surely alter the bread's molecular structure faster than the speed of light, no?"More »