Five Reasons Courtney Love Is Wrong About Saxophones Not Belonging in Rock 'n' Roll

Categories: Oh, Really?
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As we all know, in the 1980s, the coolest member of any band was always the sax player. It's why Rob Lowe played one (while wearing a beautiful headband) in St. Elmo's Fire, and it's why Tina Turner's sexy sax man showed up in The Lost Boys, looking unspeakably magical (see above). But this week, just when we thought she was on the right track (being civil in the same room as Dave Grohl and such), Courtney Love went and blew it by declaring that "saxophones don't belong in rock 'n' roll." Now, we'll be the first to admit that the horn of plenty isn't as ubiquitous as it once was in the world of rock, but to outright dismiss it just feels lazy and a bit mean-spirited, given its undoubtedly important place in music history. Good things involving saxophones can and do happen -- here are five unwavering examples.


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Map Shows America's Music Tastes By Region -- Can You Guess What San Francisco's Are?

Categories: Oh, Really?

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Another week, another map showing broad generalizations about who in what part of America likes what kind of music. The latest one, created by real estate site Movoto, shows regional preference for certain genres. Guess what San Francisco likes? Well, as with the rest of California, it prefers rock 'n' roll -- at least according to this map. The city-by-city breakdown explains that, while "jazz and EDM showed up much higher on the list of San Francisco favorites than they did in other cities, neither outranked rock and blues." Also popular in S.F., to no one's surprise? "Indie" music, whatever that means.


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Morrissey's Autobiography: Why Was His Homosexual Relationship Cut From U.S. Editions?

Categories: Oh, Really?
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If you're anything like us, then you've probably always thought of Morrissey as an asexual man-orchid: very pretty, but far too sensitive and high-maintenance to get particularly close to anyone else. Our assumptions, however, were blown out of the water in October when his autobiography -- not very creatively titled Autobiography -- was released in his British homeland, revealing love-life details that we'd never heard before. "When?" we cried! "When will we get to hear all the special details of Morrissey's sexy-time adventures?"

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Katy Perry, Oft-Naked Pop Star, Tells Other Naked Pop Stars to "Put it Away"

Categories: Oh, Really?
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Katy Perry tried to make a coherent argument about something topical over the weekend, but instead emitted an under-considered stream of consciousness that made her look simultaneously short-sighted, hypocritical, and completely dunder-headed, all in the space of about 60 seconds. That's quite a feat when you think about it! To make matters worse, the interview in question was with one of the smartypants at NPR's Weekend Edition.

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Sacto Punk Band Films Porno on Westboro Baptist Church's Front Lawn

Categories: Oh, Really?

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Get Shot, masturbatory provocateurs.
So a Sacramento punk band called Get Shot filmed its female bassist pleasuring herself on the front lawn of the Westboro Baptist Church's headquarters.

Why did they do it? More like, why not? After all, this band already has its own free porn site. Gotta keep things interesting somehow. Plus, the Westboro Baptist Church is basically the worst, as the band pointed out in a Facebook-posted "Press Release!!!!" today.

"The Phelps family and Westboro Baptist Church are ridiculous and do nothing except spread hate and cause controversy. As a bisexual woman and the bass player of a ridiculous punk band, I wanted to spread my legs and cause controversy," says Get Shot's Laura Lush.


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Reminder: Those Milk Crates Holding Your Vinyl Make You a Criminal

Categories: Oh, Really?

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Milk Crate Review
Yes, it's true: As our friends over at Modern Farmer remind us today, taking (or long-term borrowing, whatever you want to call it) milk crates from legit dairies or supermarkets for your personal use is, um, a crime! (At least if you have more than five.) Which is too bad, because as we all know, they're incredibly useful, very-low-cost storage containers for many things, including vinyl records, or whatever needs to go on the back of your bicycle. The theft of milk crates is estimated to cost the dairy industry $80 million a year, and is a serious-enough thing that there's a whole website dedicated to the problem. You cyclists and vinyl hoarders aren't exactly the scourge of the industry; the worst offenders are large-scale thieving operations, which grind the crates up and usually recycle the material.

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John Vanderslice Calls Third Eye Blind "Garbage Music" and Stephan Jenkins a "Boorish Oaf"

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Third Eye Blind's Stephan Jenkins at SXSW 2013. Photo by Christopher Victorio.
Stop whatever you're doing and read this searing Onion A.V. Club interview wherein one San Francisco songwriter named John Vanderslice savages another San Francisco songwriter named Stephan Jenkins (of Third Eye Blind). Because while a savaging was called for (this piece is a recurrent feature in which artists discuss songs they hate), Vanderslice doesn't stop at saying Third Eye Blind makes "garbage music." He doesn't stop with an ugly tale about the time the band booked Tiny Telephone, the recording studio he owns. He stabs into the song's druggy, "misogynistic" depths, concluding that Jenkins is "a net negative as a person." Here are a few sample quotes:


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Here Is the Billboard That Proves the Rolling Stones Are Playing San Francisco This Year

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The S.F. billboard
So the Rolling Stones have been making a rather large, um, bang on Twitter all week about some big announcement coming tomorrow, April 3. Yes, it is almost certainly going to be U.S. tour dates for this spring -- a continuation of the band's 50th Anniversary shows of last year. And yes, it's almost certainly going to include San Francisco. Because if not, this electronic billboard at the west end of the Bay Bridge, and those ads on Muni stops around town would be, like, really dick.

See also: The Rolling Stones Announce Two Bay Area Concerts in May


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Apologetic Morrissey Announces Month-Long S.F. Residency, With Ticket Insurance

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Perhaps, as Morrissey once sang, "Sorry Doesn't Help" -- but the singer is going to try anyway. Acknowledging for the first time the six Bay Area concerts he's cancelled in a row, Morrissey today announced plans for a month-long live residency in San Francisco this summer.

"Dear San Francisco, I'm sorry ... I'm feeling better, and I'll do my best to play for you this time," the England-born, Los Angeles-based former Smiths singer said in a statement, alluding to his recent health problems. "We shall be together for a whole month -- as long as you keep the smell of burning animals away."


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Third Eye Blind's SXSW Show Drew Huge Crowd, Was Shut Down By Cops

Categories: Oh, Really?, SXSW

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Christopher Victorio
The crowd at Third Eye Blind's Friday-night SXSW showcase.
In case you think you're the only one who furtively savors "Semi-Charmed Life" or "Jumper" or any other tunes from S.F. pop-rock '90s breakout Third Eye Blind, let us assure you: You aren't.

See, for example, the band's Friday night showcase at this year's South by Southwest conference, which took place at an outdoor venue on Fifth street in downtown Austin -- and conveniently, across the street from a multistory parking garage. Third Eye Blind began playing to a not-full crowd, but the audience quickly grew. Security stopped letting people into the venue, so onlookers piled up along the major thoroughfare. Meanwhile, smarter viewers climbed up into the parking garage for an arena perspective.


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