Jay Z and Beyoncé Have Gone Vegan... And Think It Will Be Much Harder Than It Is

Categories: Food
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In case you don't keep abreast of the dietary habits of the rich and famous, Jay Z announced yesterday that he and awesome wife, Beyoncé, were commencing a "plant-based" diet -- that's vegan to you and me -- for 22 whole days; quitting just in time for the Annual Turkey Slaughter Part 2 (aka Christmas). While we applaud this healthy, animal-friendly decision, we can't help but feel that Jay Z is making a whole lot of fuss about something that's really pretty straightforward.  

Writing on his blog, the Jigga stated: "I will post my progress... Any professional vegans out there that have any great food spots please help out! Please ha." Is it just us, or is dude acting like he's going to be toiling on the land himself? He lives in New York. New York! A culinary mecca that (almost) rivals San Francisco for awesome, vegan-friendly restaurants. Has this guy never heard of Yelp?

Aside from anything else, we're entirely positive that all Jay and Bey have to do for the next three weeks is employ a vegan chef to move in and do everything for them -- hardly a stretch when Forbes just named them the highest-earning celebrity couple in America. And even if these two did want to prepare food themselves, a brief browse of veganism's favorite book, Animal Ingredients A to Z, and a quick sprint around Whole Foods, and they'd be golden.

Veganism is not rocket science. It's common sense plus an extra 10 minutes in the supermarket to read food labels. While we love the fact that Jay and Bey have publicized their choice to do this "spiritual and physical cleanse" -- hopefully inspiring fans to give an animal-friendly diet a try -- when Jay Z makes it sound like it will be an incredible hardship, it kind of cancels out the good publicity.



There are plenty of vegan musicians out there -- Fiona Apple, Joan Jett, André 3000, Chrissie Hynde, Travis Barker, at least half of AFI, Garth freakin' Brooks -- who do this full-time and don't make a big fuss about it. Who ever saw Adam Yauch pouting about the lack of cheeseburgers in his diet?

Jay's not sure that this new, temporary discipline is something that will influence his eating habits in the future. "I don't know what happens after Christmas," he wrote. "A semi-vegan, a full plant-based diet? Or just a spiritual and physical challenge? We'll see..."

Jay, we promise you: cutting out all of the animal and animal by-products from your diet will become second nature after a week at it, and you'll feel all the better for doing so. Hell, if you eat at restaurants the entire time, chances are you won't even notice the meat's gone. And please, by all means, come hang out in San Francisco for the next three weeks and revel in the food stylings of Herbivore, Millenium, Gracias Madré, and many more.

So, in conclusion, we wish Jay Z and his lovely wife the best of luck with this new endeavor. We just hope they figure out really fast quite how easy it is to eat vegan and keep your stomach satisfied. Failing that, they should just invite Erykah Badu over all the time and make her do all the cooking.

-- @Raemondjjjj
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