Sorry, Billie Joe, But Your Onstage Freak-Out Was Not Punk

Categories: Mischief
billie-joe-middle-finger-2.jpg
Billie Joe in Las Vegas.
[Editor's note: Former SF Weekly intern Matt Saincome fronts a killer straight-edge hardcore band called Zero Progress. Seeing as he, like Green Day, hails from the East Bay, we decided he should be the one to remind Billie Joe Armstrong why having a meltdown onstage and going to rehab for substance abuse isn't punk behavior at all.]

Dear Billie Joe,

I've noticed lots of people on the interwebs talking about how "punk" your recent actions were, so I'm writing you a letter to clear some things up. First and foremost, I think it's important to remind you and everyone out there that there are only two kinds of people in this world: punks and non-punks. You chose your side a long time ago.

See also:

* Green Day's Billie Joe Armstrong To Enter Rehab After Onstage Meltdown

So shut your nasally little mouth for one second, and take some advice from a real punk, Mr. Been Around Since 1988. Because I might be half your age, but I have more punk in my pinky finger than you have in your entire body.

There is nothing punk about having a drunken divalicious breakdown at the iHeartRadio Festival because your set was too short. They probably only gave you one more minute because they knew that your new song "Oh Love" was coming up, and let's face it -- no one wants to hear that shit.

One minute is supposed to be the duration of a punk song, not the length of your temper tantrum YouTube clip, Billie.

Oh what's that? You aren't Justin Bieber? Of course you aren't, silly! Everyone knows Bieber has a much better haircut. Also, I think Rihanna was actually up next, not the Biebz. Wait, it was Usher who cut into your time, right? You are the company you keep, buddy. [Ed. note: Green Day reps say that the band's time wasn't cut short, contrary to some press reports.]

zero-progress-punk.jpg
Matt Saincome fronting Zero Progress
I'm sorry, though -- maybe I've misunderstood what you were trying to imply with that statement. Because you sound like the drunken relative people do their best to avoid at a holiday party. Are you trying to say you are more rebellious than Bieber?

Is it rebellious to smash your guitar on stage in front of a bunch of soccer moms at an event designed to promote Clear Channel's new smartphone app? I'll let you figure that one out. But I do know that you handled Vegas like a sorority girl on her 21st birthday. That's not rebellious, it's just embarrassing.

Speaking of females, can you please ask your designer, John Varvatos, why he dresses you up like a 14-year-old girl who is angry at her father? I mean if you are going the girly route, can you at least get back in touch with your roots and rock a belly shirt like The Ramones?

Next: A hardcore alternative to rehab.

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30 comments
SnotFaceXX
SnotFaceXX

Only posers call other people posers you fucking piece of shit.

Rich
Rich

Billie takes shits that sound better than you.  Epic failure, Matt.

SantasBalls
SantasBalls

Holy crap.  Your band is awful.  I can't believe you have the audacity to insult Green Day but pollute the world with that garbage.

 

This is not music - Duh nuh nuh nuh nuh nuh! Rahhh! Duh nuh nuh nuh nuh nuh! Rahhh! 

DeathDad
DeathDad

Not only is this unintentionally hilarious, it's a wonderful exhibition of the few chronically mediocre individuals who still cling onto the word punk like it's meant anything for the past 20 years. From the clips I listened to on bandcamp, Zero Progress doesn't come off as terrible by any means but just the same boiler plate hardcore that has been barfed and ignored aside from a group of frumpy white boys whose anger is only matched by how boring they are. What used to be a genre occupied by people pushing boundaries both artistically and culturally has become the domain of unremarkable white dudes from over nurturing environments, still hopelessly putting on the charade that they have anything to offer the world beyond helping a customer try out an instrument at guitar center. The fact SF Weekly would publish such a limp Livejournal worthy rant shows how not only the publication but SF itself has morphed from a once counter culture mecca to the stomping ground of Zynga employed brogrammers. Thank you,Matt Saincome. Your lack of self-awareness has made your frightened public tantrum very entertaining. 

Brock20
Brock20

Judy Garland and her daughter, Liza Minnelli, were/are the only true punk artists. Everything else is just loud white dudes into politics. 

telecranker
telecranker

I think it's unanimous, Matt. Your trash talkin' is nothing but self promoting lameness at it's worst. And your "band" really blows. Just disappear.

FrannyGlass
FrannyGlass

actually, you are a fucking retard. not even funny

JibJab
JibJab

The Arab Spring is more "punk" than anything here.

Broseph
Broseph

ahaha matt, you fucking meathead.  is the man in the picture above about to stab you in the throat with a rubber penis, or is that just my booze addled brain making me hallucinate?

 

Maria_Mitchell
Maria_Mitchell

As an old broad that was a punk before you were even born (Oh thats right, real punk predates YOUR  "real" punk which essentially reduces you to yet another copy cat kid...but I digress) I find it lame of you to offer to literally  beat an man when he is down.

You're such a cunt.

 

I'm confident he regrets what happened for a variety of reasons but I highly doubt punk credibility was one of them. Fire water make you crazy and yes some human beings are weak and succumb. At least he is getting help.

Maybe his public rock bottom will encourage another someday?  Totally Pollyanna - hella not punk. Good on him.

 

I wish Billie Joe and his family the best in these trying times. Addiction not only being painful and complicated but the damage it leaves behind touches too many.

Yeah, totally not punk and so the hell what?

 

Maybe it's not very punk rock of me to be kind and concerned but at least I don't come off like arrogant, attention seeking prick.

You sicken me and I am not really even a big fan of Green Day.

 

Grow up.

rae_alexandra
rae_alexandra

This open letter was SO FUCKING RAD... until that "I'll beat the straight edge into you with one of my chains" bit. Seriously, dude? You must know by now that saying shit like that makes people fucking hate straight edgers! Being a threatening, violent meathead is kind of just as bad as being a drunk diva at a corporate event. You 100% made sense until that part...

WhySoButtmad
WhySoButtmad

lol @ reading what some pud in a straightedge band has to say about anything. 

Madden1077
Madden1077

@SFAllShookDown A straightedge singer calling out a veteran rock star for not being punk is more tired than the collected works of LMFAO

boris4prez
boris4prez

wow, after actually watching the video, i gotta say....its amazing

boris4prez
boris4prez

so many miffed billie joe fans LOLz

epicsauce
epicsauce

"I'm punk" says some kid from Danville.

MyBigMouthIsLouder
MyBigMouthIsLouder

It baffles me that SF Weekly pays you to post pithy, empty youtube comments with a picture of yourself smack dab in the middle. Somebody's a little jealous of Billie Joe's success, eh, Mr. punk musician?

BlogsAreSoooPunk
BlogsAreSoooPunk

Pop-Punk as a genre has taken its share of abuse. You dig a little bit and you'll understand that beneath the beginner-level fanbase lies today's Lookout! Records scene disseminated over many, many, many labels and bands and countries with all of the underground cred Green Day sacrificed to create them. Green Day's integrity died for the sins of Insubordination Rec, 1-2-3-4 Go!, Hopeless, Honest Don's, Vagrant, and so on.

BlogsAreSoooPunk
BlogsAreSoooPunk

What a fcking attention-grabbing whore the writer of this rant is. Billie's alcoholism was just revealed to the world, AND he's your neighbor, AND he inadvertently created your screamo finger-tapping shit music. Show some RESPECT. Sorry he isn't carrying the banner for YOUR own personal cause. Wait five years and see how much you still care about music, because I bet you'll be programming code 70 hours a week with too much of a stress headache to listen to anything but NPR. What a crock of shit you are and I hope you die.

Jayy
Jayy

Billie would kick your skinny ass.  I hope he does come to one of your pathetic shows to do just that.  I bet you wouldn't have anything to say then.

Saincome_is_not_punk
Saincome_is_not_punk

F-ck off, Matt. You have no idea what punk is. You live within "punk" rules given to you by others. "One minute is supposed to be the duration of a punk song." F-ck offfff. Green Day does whatever the f-ck they want; you do what you're told. What sounds more punk to you?

Panicneil
Panicneil

That was awful. Immature, untalented, and embarrassingly transparent hit job on a guy San Fran wanna-be punks have been needlessly trashing since the mid-90s. Get over it.

Reese
Reese

To be fair I checked out your music. You sound like a bunch of 8 year olds banging on broken instruments.  The singer sounds like GG Allin with the flu.  You guys suck!

MardyBum
MardyBum

Attention-Seeking Punk  trying to promote his band. Nice try

Reese
Reese

Hey Mr Shittiest band on the planet Matt Saincome.  This article made you look like 10 times douchebag that Billie Joe ever could.  Your jealousy is shining through like the sun through a magnifying glass.  We all know your shitty band couldn't write a song that is worthy of Green Day taking a piss on.  So take your article and shove it right up your ass, or would you enjoy that too much?

SFAllShookDown
SFAllShookDown

@Madden1077 Young punx calling bullshit on their elders may be an old tradition, but it's a healthy one. Still got love for Billie Joe.

Madden1077
Madden1077

@SFAllShookDown Sure, and he's not wrong (except maybe about the Varvatos part), but it's just a bit "well, duh!".

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