Top 10 Signs Andrew W.K. Is Playing in S.F. Tonight
We heard that something interesting might be happening at the Regency Ballroom tonight -- something like, say, motivational-metal cult leader Andrew W.K. performing his entire first album, I Get Wet. Could this be true? Here are 10 ways to tell if Andrew W.K. will perform in S.F. tonight:
10. Thrift stores from the Marina to the Mission completely sold out of white pants.
9. The greasy, long-haired weirdos you run into on Muni today seem to have slept indoors last night.
8. Half the city requested to take Wednesday as a "personal day."
7. Normally grouchy people overheard muttering, "I feel really good about myself!"
6. Even more San Franciscans feeling urge to move to New York.
5. Regency Ballroom putting in more puke buckets than it did for Kreayshawn's all-ages New Year's Eve show.
4. You're thinking about quitting tech to become a motivational speaker.
3. Instead of holding their standard Tuesday meeting, S.F. supervisors abruptly adjourn, issuing statement that reads simply, "IT'S TIME TO PARTY."
2. Liquor store employees compare torrent of alcohol sales to the days just before Prohibition, or a regular Friday before a three-day weekend.
1. Google search traffic for "how do I give myself a bloody nose" spikes in the S.F. Bay Area.