Train, Worst Band Ever to Come From San Francisco, To Play Small Venues Citywide

Categories: Show To Know

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See you in April, dudes.

[Post updated Feb. 21 at 7 p.m.]
Unless this is some kind of early and ill-timed April fool's joke on us, the week of April 10, 2012, will bring a bland and terrible horror to many hallowed local stages: Train, the San Francisco embarrassment, wine-shilling ruse, and mom-pop juggernaut, is apparently performing that week at Cafe Du Nord (April 10), Great American Music Hall (April 11), Bimbo's (April 12), Slim's (April 13), the Independent (April 14), and the Fillmore (April 15).

What to make of this? Surely the charm offensive is a marketing ploy for Train's new album, the blankly titled California 37, which sees release the following Tuesday. But this isn't the first time Patrick Monahan and his band of bores have held court at a San Francisco venue far smaller than their normal arenas. In 2004, Train melted hearts for five nights in a row at Cafe Du Nord to support My Private Nation, and as you'll see from our predecessor's recap, it was a triumphant affair deserving of reverence and adoration. Ahem.

Still, in 2012, Train is arguably an even bigger success than it was in the heady days that followed Drops of Jupiter's creep to ubiquity. As we recently explored, the band's 2009 album Save Me San Francisco launched it back into the (albeit fractured) heights of adult pop in the early 21st Century, which means Train once more became the preferred soundtrack of supermarkets and discount-clothing retailers from Fresno to Tallahassee, and got played on the radio enough times to drive some of us absolutely fucking crazy.

None of the band's cheesy come-ons to San Francisco had any seductive powers on the last record. (We tried.) Will they in April, when Monahan (who now lives in a Seattle suburb) and Co. shrink their sweet nothings to fit inside real local rock clubs? To put it more mildly than we've ever put anything about Train: We're skeptical.

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Follow us on Twitter @SFAllShookDown, follow Ian S. Port @iPORT, and like us at Facebook.com/SFAllShookDown.


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19 comments
TrainiacsLOL
TrainiacsLOL

Just stumbled upon this article and I cannot believe all these people defending Train. You are spot on man, Train are an embarrassment.  Don't let these people tell you otherwise.

Timothy Moon
Timothy Moon

lol...i think I just read a comment calling train "alternative" put the pipe down for a sec. and listened to this crappy thing they call a song...

Timothy Moon
Timothy Moon

Ok, Now that We've heard from all of train's friends...Thank you for this...This morning, here in Akron, Ohio, our public radio, that usually plays decent music, played this garbage about a "drive by" of some sort...anyway, I've emailed them and written on their Facebook page that if I hear this crap ever again I will never listen or donate again! This is the worst kind of "pop" that some lesser teeny-bopper station can play to death, and that they are better than this...

Mark Talmadge
Mark Talmadge

I'm disappointed in Ian S. Port, the writer of this article. It just shows a level of disrespect that is horrible and spiteful. Train has succeeded where so many Alternative Rock groups have failed. Matchbox 20 has fallen off the map, LIVE has broken up and with Rap starting to lose interest and Alternative Rock returning to where it should be, Train is one band that has managed to stick around and produce new "radio-friendly" music.

The only thing I was disappointed in, with Train, was the fact that they let Charlie Colin go. I've been following this band since their Drops of Jupiter album and their music seems to get better and better with each new album. I was disappointed with "Save Me, San Francisco", which I consider their weakest album.

CINDY BALDWIN
CINDY BALDWIN

Wow Ian, Why so harsh?? Train is a fantastic band, they write all their own music, play real instruments, and are caring real people. They have so much talent!!!! Have you ever really listened to their music? You have some nerve to disrespect them like this, I don't understand people like you, you have a very mean heart. I Challenge you to go to one of their shows, see all the love the fans have for them and each other, then right another story. Plus Pat has one of the best voices in the music industry. I LOVE TRAIN<3<3<3<3

Furtaw
Furtaw

Dude! Are you friggen serious? I cant believe you are dissing TRAIN, a tad bit jealous eh? you know opinions are like assholes everyone has em, and yours is seriouly full of SHIT!!! nuff said

Nicole (AKA Tainette)
Nicole (AKA Tainette)

Like I said b4 the tickets sell out fast, and guess what dumb@$$ Ian, this band is supposeable bad music etc, well they sold out 6 shows within mins so there, and yea, did ya get ur tix ;)

Susan (Train Fan all the way)
Susan (Train Fan all the way)

I'm quite skeptical that Ian S. (Shithead) Port has any talent or knowledge of....  TRAIN is a great band and produces great hits! What a jerk! This isn't jouranlism, it's a jeaslous loser bashing talented musicians. Can''t believe the editor let this guy publish this crap.  Go TRAIN! Keep putting out songs I want to hear!  

ChillOutTrainFans
ChillOutTrainFans

Thanks for the warning about the Train take over of San Francisco for that week in April.  I'll happily stay on my side of the Bay Bridge with my headphones in, lest I be subjected to another iteration of Drops of Jupiter.  (I spent a summer working retail as a young'n and I still have nightmare flashbacks of this song on constant loop...heaven help me!)

And all you Train fans need to chill out.  Everyone has a right to his or her own opinion, even if you don't like it.  Breathe, people, breathe.  I promise the "bad man", Ian Port, won't take your precious Train away from you.  Only time and their eventual slide into pop obscurity will.

Kelli
Kelli

If the Train fans need to chill, then Ian Port must need to spend a year....or more...in the Arctic. Train continues to pay tribute to the wonderful city of San Francisco. Now they are taking the time to give back to all those fans who started with them in the small clubs in SF by playing at those smaller venues once again. How many bands do that? Train does so much for so many charities and always makes time for the fans, which is one reason why all the concerts in SF sold out in minutes. No need to worry about this Train fan.....I am breathing just fine and will be breathing even better when I am listening to Train at the Independent and the Fillmore! Thanks for your concern though. :) Choo Choo!

Silvana
Silvana

What happened here? This article sucks but...why are we reading this crap in a page like this, "only for Train fans"??? I love them and I will be there...nothing more to say.

Carolandjose
Carolandjose

This must be a joke. Train is the very best group ever!!!

Nicole (AKA Tainette)
Nicole (AKA Tainette)

Wow! Dude ur a total Dumb@$$! Ur a total joke! Ppl u know what they say about Haterz make them famous and look were there at, F-A-M-O-U-S! If they are so bad and horrible then why talk about them, why listen to their music, etc. Funny every show I have gone to (and thats alot of train shows) they have ALWAYS been sold out, and everyone had a blast! Maybe you should check out a show, wait nevermind your not a real person, us Train fans are real ppl so u wouldnt fit in. ;)

Suerrocker
Suerrocker

Are you freakin serious? I am so excited to see them in Frisco along with all the trainiacs! All their shows will be sold out and while we will be rockin and having fun you will be at home watching re-runs. Jump on the rail and go for a ride with us, you might like it !!  :)

Brian Pyzynski
Brian Pyzynski

This Ian Port guy is an ass. To express dislike over something mildly is acceptable in an article, but blatantly insulting people so harshly is not entertaining, not to mention inaccurate. Train is awesome!

Teresa Morales
Teresa Morales

I'm flying from Boston to San Fran just to catch a couple of shows. Bet you don't have a single person that would do that to see YOU. Nothing worse than a hater spewing negativity. What exactly did this article accomplish? It's fine if you don't like their music, but when words are such vile-filled vessels of hate, makes me think there's a whole lot of jealousy behind them.

Farryn Melton
Farryn Melton

You must be inhaling a strong hallucinaenic, are a jilted lover, or simply jealous.. because you can't possibly be serious. Train is a FANTASTIC band with MANY ardent followers. Their music is positive, creative, fun and they are fantastic people too. (well most of them). It's sad that you felt the need to write this article, but believe me, there are many who disagree with you - their popularity and chart placement is evidence. Train ROCKS!

Masayo McCormick
Masayo McCormick

damn, is this kind of  a joke? I hope so.... hopefully just advertising purpose to talk shit about TRAIN.... because WE FREAKEN LOVE THEM!

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