The Top 10 Worst Film Performances By Musicians
By DAVE GIL DE RUBIO
Rock star, singer-songwriter, producer, interior designer -- now we should add thespian to the many creative hats sported by Lenny Kravitz, who performs tonight (Feb. 14) at the Fox Theater in Oakland. In keeping with the family business -- his mom was the late Roxie Roker, a.k.a. Helen Willis on The Jeffersons -- Kravitz has mostly played himself on screen, aside from a small but critically-acclaimed part as a male nurse in the 2009 drama Precious. And with Kravitz's follow-up part playing Cinna in next month's eagerly awaited film adaptation of The Hunger Games only his second stab at playing a fictional character, the jury is still sorta out regarding the man's acting chops. And there are more than enough wince-inducing cinematic performances delivered by musicians moonlighting as would-be thespians to make us worry. Here are the 10 all-time worst.
10. Vanilla Ice in Cool As Ice
Riding the wave created by hijacking "Under Pressure" and turning it into the first hip-hop single to top the Billboard charts, the man born Robbie Van Winkle got a crack at being the next Marlon Brando by way of playing the rebellious and motorcycle-riding rapper Johnny Van Owen. What Ice got instead was lots of overexposure and a Golden Raspberry Award for Worst Actor.
9. Queen Latifah in Taxi
The can-do Dana Owens went from hip-hop trailblazer to respected actress thanks to roles as a main character in the classic Fox sitcom Living Single and an Academy Award nomination for playing Matron "Mama" Morton in the 2002 film adaptation of Chicago. Apparently the air at the Oscars must have been mighty thin -- why else would she agree to appear alongside Lorne Michaels lap-dog Jimmy Fallon and Mrs. Tom Brady Gisele Bundchen in this thoroughly unwatchable millennial answer to D.C. Cab?
8. Dolly Parton in Rhinestone
Fresh off Golden Globe nods for Nine to Five and The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas, someone thought having Dolly star alongside Sylvester Stallone playing a New York City cabbie-turned-nascent-country-music-star was a good idea. The reality is even worse than the premise, making this the most overt misstep on Parton's otherwise solid track record.
7. Britney Spears in Crossroads
Remember when Britney was getting sapphic with Madonna at the MTV VMAs, raking in major endorsement moolah from Pepsi, and trying to channel Prince in her transition from teeny bopper to mature musical artist? Feeling pretty heady, Team Britney put together a script and financing for this dramedy road film that included Zoe Saldana playing Brit's BFF, Dan Aykroyd slumming for a paycheck ... and a Golden Raspberry Award for Worst Actress.