R.I.P. Warrant's Jani Lane: Top Five Sexist Rock Videos He'd Have Enjoyed
|R.I.P. Jani Lane|
5. "Legs," ZZ Top
You know what lowly shoe store attendants need? Makeovers, that's what. Makeovers conducted by three metal spokesmodels and masterminded by two old, dirty bearded men and their moustachioed side-kick. Because if you're female, it is impossible to feel fulfilled or empowered, without (a) a shopping montage and (b) wearing frilly pink ankle socks and skirts that flash your underwear to the world every time you move. As we all know, when skirts get shorter, the ability to fight back increases. Glad that's cleared up, then.
4. "California Girls," David Lee Roth
Ol' Dave is definitely one of the most guilty teachers in the woman-as-accessory school of thought, as you'll see in this video, where so much attention is given to breasts and buttocks, we're almost completely sure that none of these women even have faces. Dave gets a free pass though because he shows a fair bit of flesh himself (underneath all that chest hair). And, gosh, it's hard to even stay mad at that goofy prankster when he's high-kicking around the place like a buffoon.
3. Warrant, "Cherry Pie"
Warrant was clearly terrified that its audience wasn't going to get the oh so subtle vagina-as-dessert metaphor running rampant through this song, so when it came to making the video, the members felt the need to include a slow-motion shot of a slice of cherry pie falling straight into the lap of an ex-Miss Teen U.S.A. contestant. In case we're still not clear, they then get her all wet with their massive hose. Nice one, fellas -- all that sex stuff would've gone straight over our heads had you not helped us out like that.