Secrets of the Fillmore Kitchen: The Vines Spit out Their Food, Chefs Are Assholes, and George Thorogood Eats Vegetarian
Be Prepared for Pointless Questions
"Um, guys? Whatever you order is going to be served to you on paper, so when you ask 'So what do you recommend?' it feels totally condescending and entirely pointless. Seriously dudes, you're talking venue food, not the French Laundry, so there's little opinion to be had either way. No one got up early to find the best local parsley for your garlic fries, and -- just a heads up -- the cheese in that quesadilla you're going to get is from Costco. It's all straight-forward but pretty darned tasty, so just pick one and move on."
Accept That You Won't Leave a Shift "Party-Ready"
"Smelling like grease, beef, cheese, spilled beer, dish water, disinfectant, smoke machine, and 1,200 other people's colognes after work doesn't make you the belle of whatever ball you're planning to go to afterwards. The free shows and free posters made the job worth it though -- especially when the food rush died out soon after the show started and you could hover around the balconies to watch."
Be Prepared for Band Ass-Holes
"The Vines [remember them?] and their people were eating dinner upstairs before their show, when all of a sudden the singer, Craig Nicholls, spit out a mouthful of food, threw his plate on the ground, grabbed his skateboard, did an ollie on the carpet, and skated off, tossing his beverage behind him. The server and I looked at each other with dropped jaws. It was a real 'Hey-Assbag-Your-Mom-Doesn't-Live-Here' moment. I mean, I know rock stars are supposed to leave a crumb trail of destruction in their path, but the Fillmore is a historical and rather lovely establishment. It is one thing for a drunk or someone getting their groove on to accidentally spill a drink, but to intentionally soil any part of the place is just uncouth!"
|Craig Nicholls: Massive Pain In The Ass|
"The head cook was a real killjoy. When he wasn't fighting with his ex or moping, he was showing just how intense he could be by slamming things around unnecessarily. I don't think he was taken that seriously, but the mood in the kitchen was far less jolly and jokey when he was around."
(Ex-Fillmore chef Emily Wall confirms: "I'll tell you the truth -- most chefs are assholes, me included.")
Beware of Entourages
"Folks trying to use whatever loose association to an artist or verbal pass into the green room to try and get special treatment are very fond of telling you 'I'm with muzique'. I heard it over and over -- apparently 'muzique' rolls deep. Thankfully, whatever irritation occurred during work hours was always swiftly blocked out by delicious post-shift shots with awesome co-workers."
"You get to see a lot of random acts that you wouldn't have paid to see, and that's great -- I fell for Mission Of Burma after working their show; and I never would have guessed it, but Barry Williams (yep -- Greg Brady) singing 1960's Top 40 hits was kind of bitchin'. When George Thorogood played, he passed on the catering provided and bought his own vegetarian meal from down the street. I like George Thorogood and vegetables both very much -- I just expected to see the 'Bad To The Bone' guy actually gnaw on one! It was a little disenchanting to be honest. Willie Nelson shows were always the best though. Aside from Willie ruling, his fans are stoned, old hippies with the munchies. Because they are largely a maturing crowd, they are beyond being cheap, so they do order food and they do tip (unlike a great deal of other people). Plus the old dudes will usually add a slightly flirty/creepy wink to the transaction, which is always entertaining."
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