All Shook Down Festival: Everything You Need to Know Is Right Here

​This is it. We promise. It. The last "we're having a festival and it's going to be awesome and you should come" post. The last one. For this year, anyway.

We couldn't resist one final opportunity to guide you, like a friendly Friday afternoon phone tree, through the preliminaries of this Sunday's All Shook Down Festival in North Beach -- aka your chance to see Janelle Monae, Neon Indian, and some 30-odd local bands (good ones!) on an outdoor stage and in intimate clubs in North Beach.

So imagine a sexy female robot voice:

Press one for the All Shook Down Festival schedule, which you should probably read before you imbibe too much beer or barbecue, start seeing double, and miss Ty Segall or Forrest Day or Santero.

Press two for the All Shook Down Festival website, where you can buy a wristband, V.I.P. pass, and find out more about the layout of things around Grant and Green, food vendors, and other important details.
Press three to read our thoughts on why this inaugural event is unlike any other music festival in this city that loves music festivals.

Press four to hear why Alan Palomo of Neon Indian, whose 22nd birthday is tomorrow, who was born in Mexico, and who loves New Order, thinks that chillwave is a term that  the Internet rather absurdly slapped on "psychedelic tape music." And why he's not an introvert even if his songs do get written and recorded in the bedroom.

Press five to read why ASD performer DJ Platurn (of the Oakland Faders) thinks song requests suck and is disappointed by the rise of bottle service hip-hop.

Press six to read why ASD performer and Bay Area folkie Odessa Chen sings about endangered animals and earns comparisons to Jeff Buckley.

Press seven to read why Deerhunter's Bradford Cox thinks ASD headliner Janelle Monae is "the new Bowie."

Press eight for an conversation with S.F. DJ and ASD performer Ghosts on Tape about why his music sometimes comes out creepy.

Press nine if you want to know why garage girls Grass Widow practice in a meat locker.

And that concludes the linking portion of this message. We're sorry, but no operators are standing by to take your call. Please hang up and get your ass down to North Beach on Sunday. If you most certainly cannot come, but want to vicariously experience the awesomeness, check back here Sunday for updates on how the show is going. And check our Twitter account, @SFAllShookDown.

Otherwise, we hope to see you there.