Thursday Club Spotlight: Hold It at SF Underground

Hold It
SF Underground
Friday: August 29, 2008
Notes and Photos by Crystal Akins

Recurring club night? That's up in the air right now.

Better than: Depend adult diapers.

Want to know what kind of sick mind games Parker Day and Nate Always played last week? On Friday at SF Underground the duo's party had all the beer you can drink for free -- but only until someone urinated. Free beer duration: One hour.

"It's an old '70s frat boy thing my mom told me about," said Always. "So I was like f---k, let's do that."

A taped off bathroom door, no ins and outs, and Parker's sharp eye forced the crowd to stay within the confines of the bar's red walls and drink to their heart's content. The crowd slammed down as many beers as possible, and at approximately 11:10 p.m., Parker emerged from the bar with a montage of photos on her camera of a girl, a dark alley and a puddle on the ground, promptly ending the game.

If forcing the crowd to "hold it" wasn't enough, Parker intended on printing copies and posting the fliers of the peeing perpetrator so we knew who to blame. After the game was over, lines for the bathroom backed up across the petite dance floor with ladies squirming to keep their bladders from exploding.

Recreating a fraternity party atmosphere didn't seem too difficult either. The ingredients: plastic party cups filled with cheap beer, music, and people crammed into a tiny space (rendering it almost impossible to stand comfortably). Located in the back of the bar, smokers and good conversation filled the outdoor patio that felt like your neighbor's backyard. Did I mention this party was planned last minute? Officially their first party thrown together, Nate and Parker managed to pull off a clever night while the dynamic of the crowd lead me to believe it was mainly composed of their friends, or friends of friends. Nevertheless, it was a night of good times.

In conjunction with the night's twisted theme, streamers and sparkly pinatas hung from the disco balls atop the dance floor-- it was Dexter's birthday (I never actually found or met him). In any case, I suspect he may have been one of the individuals wearing a gold paper crown (like the kind you got from Burger King when you were a kid).

And last but not least, DJs that kept us entertained and dancing all night included DJ Kirin Rider, St. Gabriel, and White Girl Lust with up and coming DJ DRRN lurking around.

Some Dos and Don'ts:

Do: Pay the $6 cover charge. While it's a little steep, I'm sure you can knock back your money's worth.

Don't: Think you can hide from Parker's camera. She will find you.

Do: Dress well. Surprisingly, for a dive bar, people looked hot.

Don't: Be the girl who pissed in the alleyway. We all hate you.

Critic's Notebook:

Personal Bias: Free drinks!

Random Detail: Somehow the girl who ruined the game managed to just barely elude Parker's camera.

By the Way: Keep your eyes peeled for more impromptu parties.