John Mayer's Lame Food Blog
John Mayer, what can I say? I never liked your music very much, but I always admired your abilities as a guitarist, especially after those awesome cameos on Chappelle's Show. You also reportedly bagged Jessica Simpson, which is sort of cool and sort of lame at the same time. There's so much ambivalence there.
What I'm saying is, until I saw your lame food blog, you were right there at the precipice of lame/cool. Besides the high-falutin' announcement about your "mlog," which comes off like some ridiculous attempt at celebrity obsession satire (seriously, we're interested in Jessica Simpson's Ta-Tas, not your food), you put these gigantic fucking watermarks on all the pictures. So now, even the random freak who might be remotely interested in seeing the waffle you ate for breakfast won't have the satisfaction. Is this part of the satire too?
-- Brian Bernbaum