Free VIP Tickets: Carlos Mencia and crew at Wild 94.9 Comedy Jam 8-25

Categories: Comedy

All Shook Down runs in dope circles. We get CDs, concert tix, death threats - you know, the good stuff. Now we're going to start sharing. Our first item: Two box seats (with parking passes) to the Wild 94.9 Comedy Jam headlined by Carlos Mencia Saturday, August 25 down in Mountain View at Shoreline Amp. What you need to do: Comment with your best joke and include your contact email. The best joke wins the tix. Contest closes Friday, August 17 at 5 p.m. More ticket giveaways coming. Thanks for reading, SF. -d2

Other comedians on the ticket: Lisa Lampanelli, Gabriel Iglesias, Jo Koy, Anjelah Nicole Johnson (hot!), Jeff Garcia, Rex Navarrete and muthafuckin' David Alan Grier.

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A guy is having a drinkin a bar.

A lot of drinks.A very dark bar.<>He leans over to the big woman next to him and says, "Do you wanna hear a funny blonde joke?" The big woman replies, "Well, before you tell that joke, you should know something.Sure, I'm blonde, and six feet tall, 210 lbs. and I'm a professional triathlete and bodybuilder.The blonde woman sitting next to me is 6' 2" and 220 lbs;  she's an ex-pro wrestler.Next to her is a blonde who's 6' 5",weighs 250 lbs., and she's a kick boxer professional. Now, do you still want to tell that blonde joke?" The guy blinks, swallows, and thinks about it for a second then says; "No, not if I'm going to have to explain it  three times."!


There was a little boy whose mother was about to have a baby. One day, the little boy walked in and saw his mother naked. He asked his mother what the hair between her legs was. She responded, "It's my wash cloth." Weeks later, after the mother had her baby, the young boy walked in on his mother again. While she was in the hospital, the doctor had shaved her pubic hair. The boy asked, "What happened to your wash cloth?" The mother responded, "I lost it." The little boy, trying to be helpful, set out to find his mother's washcloth. A few days later, he ran to his mother yelling and screaming, "I found your washcloth." The mother, thinking that the child was just playing, went along with the boy and asked, "Where did you find it?" The boy answered, "The maid has it! She is washing daddy's face with it."

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