And on the third day of Pumpkins, our Corgan gave to thee….

Categories: Music

We haven’t hit any more of the sold-out Smashing Pumpkins shows in S.F. this week, but we can pass along another bit of hilarious gossip about the band. On Tuesday we reported that Seattle weekly rag The Stranger ran a spoof “Open Letter from Billy Corgan” last week, an obvious bit of satire that prompted a rebuttal from the band’s website.

Today Smashing Pumpkins’ press team at MSO released a statement saying, “Upon finding the letter posted on [The Stranger’s] website, several reputable national news outlets picked up the story and printed abbreviated quotes from it, thinking the letter was legitimate.”

The release went on to say, “Although this ‘open letter’ is apocryphal, there are some references and statements in it that do in fact make a few interesting points that should be pondered.” Such “facts” included the following jokey, tongue-in-cheek points:

“The letter also states that the song ‘United States’ on the new album Zeitgeist was refracted and stretched to 9 minutes. In truth, this song in its original form was well over an hour and included a reciting of the Declaration of Independence narrated by all original cast members of the film 'Reality Bites' starring Winona Ryder."

“Another mistruth in this letter is the statement that the Pumpkins were once the most important band in the world. If the facts are what we are all seeking, everyone knows that Citizen Dick has always been and will forever be the most important band in the world.”

Now Citizen Dick was Matt Dillon's band in the movie Singles, and collectively all these bullet points show that maybe camp Corgan can take a joke after all. But seriously, why all the hoo-ha about an article that was an obvious parody? What were these “reputable national news outlets” who didn’t get the sarcasm? We could only find a couple blogs that were duped, but the dupings are still pretty funny.

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