New Food Truck Debuts Recipes Designed by a Supercomputer

Categories: Tech, Video, WTF?

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Flickr/IBM Research
Watson's first food truck.
In our age of ramen burgers and tikka masala burritos, food trucks already seem like they've broken down cuisine boundaries pretty well. But here's a new twist. IBM supercomputer Watson -- the one who outsmarted humans on Jeopardy! a few years back -- has taken a new position in the kitchen. IBM recently teamed up with the Institute of Culinary Education in New York to use Watson's incredibly, superhuman database recall skills to come up with new recipes and flavor combinations for a food truck that's making its rounds in the U.S.

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New Company Claims to Make Artisanal Salami Out of Celebrities

Categories: LOLS, Meat, WTF?

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Tumblr/BiteLabs
An early Kanye test: "coarse ground fatty pork with hungarian paprika for a bit of burn, and jalapeno for a bit of spice."
The weirdest story on the Internet yesterday goes to the new company Bite Labs, which is purportedly making salumi out of celebrities. That's right: They propose to harvest cells from famous people like James Franco, Jennifer Lawrence, and Kanye West, then mix those cells with animal meat to make salami. The website has a detailed breakdown of the process by which they plan to turn your favorite celebs into sausage, and the company CEO has responded earnestly to emails from Vice and Slate. Someone's taking this prank pretty far.

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Taco Bell Boldly Moves Into New Meal Territory

Categories: WTF?

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After the "stoner's innovation" of FourthMeal, Taco Bell has outdone itself by inventing a new eating experience, a strange sort of Pre-LunchMeal, or maybe they'll call it FirstMeal, it hasn't really been nailed down yet. Starting March 27, customers entering a Taco Bell in the mid-morning hours will be able to order from a new and wondrous assortment of foods, from tacos that sub in a sweet waffle-pattered bread for tortillas to Crunchwraps filled with egg and bacon instead of the usual seasoned beef and nacho cheese sauce.

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Chicago Man Uses Kickstarter to Fund His Chipotle Burrito

Categories: Kickstarter, WTF?

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How much would you pay a stranger to eat a Chipotle burrito?
Unfortunately this isn't the Onion, and Chicago resident Noboru Bitoy for reals used Kickstarter to fund his lunch. Bitoy originally requested $8 from the crowdfunding site for a Chipotle burrito, the consumption of which he brazenly passed off as a public service ("Just how delicious is a chicken burrito from my local Chipotle? I will find & display the answer in a creative presentation!").

He got that original burrito and gave it a "Yum!" on a scale of "No." to "Wow!", to everyone's immense surprise and relief. But here's the thing: People won't stop donating to his burrito fund.

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S.F.'s Longest Food and Drink Lines, Ranked

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Facebook/Eastside Bagels
The latest entry in the annals of San Francisco line-waiting came over the weekend, when many waited for more than an hour in the rain for a chance at a day-old bagel. The bagels in question had pedigree -- they'd been overnighted from New York's legendary deli Russ & Daughters by pop-up chefs Sonya Haines and Wes Rowe -- but the Eastside Bagels team wasn't prepared for the crowds that showed up at Dear Mom on Saturday morning, and a clusterfuck commenced.

Then again, it's no secret that San Franciscans like to wait in lines. In light of this latest entry, we've ranked the city's food and drink lines*, taking into account such factors as line location, ratio of tourists to locals, swiftness of line movement, and greatness of reward at the end. Behold, the clearly definitive, soon-to-be-gospel list:

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In-N-Outrage: East Coast Writer Pens Lame Takedown of California's Favorite Burger

Categories: WTF?

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Anna Roth
Just looking at this makes me want an Animal-Style Double-Double.
The only thing more boring than another article about $4 toast is another East Coast writer complaining that In-N-Out isn't worth the hype. This tired trope has been revisited again and again, and the latest is this diatribe from Business Insider politics writer Josh Barro: "I Went To In-N-Out Burger And Found It To Be Overrated." While we're sure that Mr. Barro is fine at covering the political arena, his food criticism leaves something to be desired. Let's break down his argument, sentence by sentence.

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Space-Age Food Now Available at MUJI

Categories: SOMA, Shopping, WTF?

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Pete Kane
MUJI is that affordable Japanese housewares chain full of pens, beige-colored things, and T-shirts vacuum-sucked into tiny cubes. It's often found in airports, but there's one in SoMa and another in San Jose, each bursting with modular cleanliness from the near-future. And now this cross between Uniqlo and the Container Store is selling Japanese foods, chiefly teas and other dry goods.

See Also: Umami Mart's New "Konbini" U-Mart Stocks Obscure Japanese Kit-Kats


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Scientists Create Creepy Glow-in-the-Dark Piglets

Categories: WTF?

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Glow-in-the-dark bacon: the next big thing?
In the most unsettling food science news since the laboratory-created hamburger, Chinese scientists have created piglets that glow in the dark. Just like that Ghostbusters t-shirt you had in third grade! Seriously -- scientists in Guangdong Province in Southern China injected piglets with jellyfish DNA that makes them glow green under a blacklight, in an experiment designed to see how viable it is to move cells between animals.

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There's Now a Burrito Vending Machine in L.A.

Categories: WTF?

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Reddit/andrewgoldstein4
The future could be lurking in a corner of a 24-hour Mobil station on Santa Monica Boulevard. At least that's the first location of the new burrito vending machine, BurritoBox, which seems like a legit (though probably misguided) enterprise and not a hoax. An intrepid Reddit user claims to have tried the thing and describes it as "like a gourmet frozen burrito without the shitty texture you get from the microwave."

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Which is More Indicative of the Moment in Culinary Irrelevance?

Categories: WTF?

Slow news days breed wacky stories. So I ask you this, which is worse: A restaurant that dangles its diners 150 feet off the ground...

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