San Francisco Blog

Our favorite morsels from the food blogs and beyond.

Down and out in Rockridge: Living out his Heat dreams, Sac Bee editorial writer Stuart Leavenworth trades in an English degree for a French apron -- he's in the midst of a six-month apprenticeship at Oakland's Oliveto. His most trenchant takeaway so far? Restaurant food is made by humans: There is no "magic" to preparing superlative food. The artistry that arrives on your plate at the best restaurants is not prepared by Houdini. As a 15-year veteran of restaurants, we can roger that. Plus kitchen work makes your hands really, really smelly. Don't give up that corner office at the Bee, Stu.

Glutton for punishment: Why are reality food shows so hella bad, and why do we love them? Cooking with the Single Guy ponders that very question, vowing to blog and twitter his way through every yawn-inspiring minute of The Next Food Network Star, which starts tonight. QUICK! Who won last year? Exactly. And for the next 10 weeks, we get to see people scramble, judges choke on poorly made food, and if it's anything like last season -- a lot of tears! (I saw a preview of tonight's episode and one girl was already crying.) Hate to harsh, dude, but maybe immersing yourself in food TV is why you're still single?

Our favorite morsels from the food blogs and beyond.

Torte reform: Not sure if this means we live in the most litigious society ever or the stupidest. Slashfood left us slackmouthed with news that a woman in Cali tried to sue Quaker Oats parent PepsiCo because she felt the word "berries" implied that Cap'n Crunch Crunch Berries are, in fact, a fruit. A judge booted the suit, but not before issuing the following: This Court is not aware of, nor has Plaintiff alleged the existence of, any actual fruit referred to as a "crunchberry."

Froot not fruit: At Food Politics, badass Marion Nestle hits the notion of "functional foods" upside the head. You know functionals -- nutrients shoehorned into foods to make them arguably good for you. Thus Kelloggs is packing fiber into Froot Loops, but Nestle has questions, like what kind of fiber, and how much? And why the hell don't they just make whole grain cereals to start with? Don't mess with Nestle.

Our favorite morsels from the food blogs and beyond.

Gettin' paid: S.F. protoblogger Pim Techamuanvivit trumpeted an endorsement deal today with Rachel's Wickedly Delicious to flog cottage cheese and other goodies. The NY Times' Kim Severson suggests she may be the first cyber foodscribe to go from amateur observer to de facto flack -- read all about it at Chez Pim. We're not sure what to think about passages like this: My life as a foodie is all about having fun with food, about trying new things, and about expanding our foodie horizon. It's also about eating food that's good for us, and about making smart choices that respect the environment. That's precisely what Rachel's products are all about, and that's why I've found such synergy in working with them. Read like marketing copy to you? Are ethics even an issue in blogs these days?

Our favorite morsels from the food blogs and beyond.

We're lovin' it: At Mission Loc@l, Armand Emamdjomeh spends an entire day in the neighborhood's Mickey D's, enduring Michael Bolton and an Oreo McFlurry. Emamdjomeh manages to capture the 'hood's flavor in a way we've rarely tasted elsewhere -- jacked up, comforting, ultimately steeped in community in a way the city's higher-rent neighborhoods could never hope to be. Nice job.

Snot easy: We totally know the agony of a slow blog day -- try like hell, you just can't turn up anything to lavish your brilliance on. Like a junky boiling his cottons for the last residue of smack, Chron 's Michael Bauer wrings a reader query about, well, phlegm, into a food blog post. The question: Should you blow boogers at the table, or retreat to the loo? Here's a smidgen of Bauer's reply: If a sneeze creeps up on you, there's little that can be done; you have to deal. However, if you're going to honk and blow, then it might be best to excuse yourself. All that's missing is the Yoda-like subject-verb transposition.

Our favorite morsels from the food blogs and beyond.

Someone been takin' bitter pills: Guest-whining at Eater SF, Citysearch editor Patrick Heig gets his 2(x)ists in a twist over what he suggests is the city's bogus street-food fad. In Heig's cosmology there's authentic street food (like Manhattan's falafel carts) and pathetic, lemonade-stand street food. If we're so desperate for street food that we're willing to bestow that title on a guy selling cookies in Dolores Park, c'mon, let's not embarrass ourselves here. It's a fucking snickerdoodle. Calm down. Whatever, dude -- give it time.

Grease junky: Mid-20th century America may have been the Age of Parkay, but there's been an epochal shift: Welcome to the Age of Lard. Food writer Regina Schrambling tells the nation what S.F. already knows: Lard's negative connotations of flowing flesh and vats of grease and epithets like lardass and tub of lard have been absurd hurdles. But no longer. Embrace the grease at Salon.

Our favorite morsels from the food blogs and beyond.

Precious moments: We told you Food Gal was inviting readers to submit essays recalling their favorite wine-drinking memories. The winners sure didn't skimp on narrative, though, frankly, we couldn't manage more than a skim -- except for first-place winner Wotten 1, who has a flair for prose worthy of a bodice-ripper. With the testosterone surging through my veins like rubber rafts bouncing in white water rapids, I knew what my immediate mission was. Touch the poetry at Food Gal.

The kind of shit you say when you're high: Line Cook offers a whiff from his latest roundtable podcast featuring chefs Eddie Lau and Ryan Farr. Not sayin' anyone was high, mind you, since, well, that'd be breaking the law, and chefs are consummate professionals. We merely offer up this snippet from Farr: Just follow your stomach, and trust your instincts ... and lean on your experience and knowledge. And that's why it doesn't matter if it's TGI Fridays or French Laundry. Word.

Our favorite morsels from the food blogs and beyond.

They had to get it off their chests: It sucks being a Hooters girl, and not just because you're expected to pose with a dweeb in a Ruck Fules! tee. MenuPages reveals the lawsuit eight former tank-top-wearin' servers have brought against four local Hooters eateries (who knew there were that many?) for alleged exploitation. Be appalled. Be very appalled.

Say it ain't so: Kurt Michael Friese goes all Orwellian gloomy, ticking off recent examples of hypocritespeak in the world of food marketing: Lay's potato chips as "local food," Monsanto as a company dedicated to "sustainability," and even Oprah (PETA's person of the year for 2008) getting into bed with KFC. Righteous outrage can be cleansing; get a bracing whiff at Grist.

Our favorite morsels from the food blogs and beyond.

Arroz-con-pollo activist: Supreme Court nom Sonia Sotomayor is suspect in the eyes of some conservatives for her taste in food, which skews toward pork fat and sofrito. The Hill quotes Sotomayor from a 2001 speech: "'For me, a very special part of my being Latina is the mucho platos de arroz, gandoles y pernir -- rice, beans and pork -- that I have eaten at countless family holidays and special events.' This has prompted some Republicans to muse privately about whether Sotomayor is suggesting that distinctive Puerto Rican cuisine such as patitas de cerdo con garbanzo -- pigs' feet with chickpeas -- would somehow, in some small way influence her verdicts from the bench." Oh that they would!

Schlep report: The good news: Food Gal finds a four-star taco truck dishing out stuff like ahi and halibut tacos. The bad news: It's in San Jose. Bummer.

Our favorite morsels from the food blogs and beyond.

Doubting Thomas: At Civil Eats, East Bay eco-chef Aaron French is kinda pissed at Thomas Keller for his de facto diss of the strict constructionist view of local foods. If you can get Maine lobster delivered to your back door within a day, shouldn't it be considered temporally local? Locavores say feh.

Jackin' the Mike: It took us a day to chew on Eater SF's stalking of the Chron's Michael Bauer, publishing photos of the Gandalf-like food critic in venues as far-flung as the Minnesota State Fair (not kidding). Eater ends with a plea to photo-bust the city's whole cadre of critics, including our own Meredith Brody. Yeah, we get the point: A veteran like Bauer can't expect to be anonymous (especially in a fishbowl the dimensions of SF), so his reviews must be suspect (chefs are presumably stirring up special risotti just for table Mike). By that logic, Bauer would dish out only four-star reviews. But when he trashes a place (apologies to Acme Chophouse), or drops an established fave from his top 100 list, MB gets tarred as an unethical hack. C'mon Eater, critics are as flawed as anyone. And ironically, focusing a hot laser on Bauer has the effect of only boosting his importance.

Our favorites from the food blogs and beyond.

But at least your bathroom will smell better: Becks & Posh offers up a smidgin of verse to mark the passing of local asparagus.

Hello, kitty: Squid Ink' s Carl Stone probes one of Tokyo's latest crazes, the cat café: Simply, you pay to spend time in a room with a few other people ... and eight to ten cats of all breeds and varieties. A magazine on the table introduces each "member" by name, breed, date of birth and personality quirks. Here the cats, not the customers, are king -- please don't pick them up or wake them if they're sleeping, and of course tail pulling is completely forbidden. See one you like? Buy her some kibble -- altogether a cheaper date than the roast chicken at Zuni.