Fried Mac and Cheese, the USDA is a Punk, and Ricky Gervais Loves Kittens!

By Megan Rascal Mon., Jul. 30 2012 at 9:00 AM

What a long couple of days it's been. There's much ado! Well, of course there's the Olympics. I'm actually not that into the Olympics because I have a distaste for boredom but it's cool that Stella McCartney did the British uniforms. She's vegetarian and not vegan, right? I can never remember. The uniforms are cool though! But I guess she wasn't pleased with the rest of the British costumes. Fashion people -- can't please them, can't choke them with fur coats.

Oh, were you hoping for a halt on the foie gras ban? WRONG AGAIN, FOIE GRAS JERKS! At least for now, the geese are still safe. Seriously, fighting the foie gras ban is insulting to society as a whole. It's like those people who wanted me to sign petitions to reverse the ban on smoking in bars -- I smoked at the time but was I really going to put effort into THAT? I really couldn't find a greater cause of concern? For geese sake.

If you want to laugh/be disgusted with humanity, look no further than the National Pork Producers Council spokesman Dave Warner's comments regarding animal welfare measures:

So our animals can't turn around for the 2.5 years that they are in the stalls producing piglets.... I don't know who asked the sow if she wanted to turn around.

There's a bit of a flaw in his logic because you can't go around just asking pigs these kinds of questions and waiting for them to answer. You must first give them a xylophone. Then, you ask a yes-or-no question like, "Would you like to turn around ever?" If they hit middle C, that's a "no;" if they whimper in agony, take that as a "yes." It's not that hard, you just have to remember to bring a xylophone.

Probably the biggest joke of the week is the USDA's Meatless Monday debacle. I know I'm laughing. Those punks threw support behind Meatless Monday, only to retract when they were bullied by the meat industry. Color me surprised.

In other Twitter news, Ricky Gervais continues to work his way into my cold, cold heart by defending poor lab animals. Surprisingly, he is also opposed to sewing kittens' eyes shut. Where does he get the nerve?!

Vegansaurus, my hometown, has info on how you can protest the icky, icky circus in the coming weeks in Oakland and San Jose. Protest that mofo! It's my least favorite thing in the world, that damn circus. Free the eles!

For your recipe link this week, boy do I have something yummy! This, my friends, will lift your spirits. Because what is better than mac and cheese? DEEP-FRIED VEGAN MAC AND CHEESE! This recipe can be found at Olives for Dinner and Erin assures me that it's super easy to make. So make me some!

In adorable news, in Michelle Obama's Kids' State Dinner competition, the winner from Nevada, 9-year-old Alexea Wagner, won with a vegan sloppy joe and kale salad recipe! Huzzah! We've got 9-year-olds in Nevada, the rest of the country will soon follow. That's all for this week!