Holiday Cheesecakes, Zachary's New Vegan Pizza, & Quorn Goes Vegan!
• Quorn, everyone's favorite English purveyor of vegetarian meats made from magic, is finally introducing a vegan burger. Sorry, vegetarians, vegans are taking away your options and we are not sorry. Go cry into whatever egg-and-cheese pie you're eating, and GOOD DAY, SIR.
• Zachary's is now making vegan pizza! This is the stuff I grew up on, and it holds a special place in my heart as the most delicious pizza of all time. I highly recommend you try the vegan slices because damn, it is DELICIOUS. Rich, buttery crust, and a tomato sauce that'll make you slap your mama.
• Eliza Dushku is going vegan. For now. Check back next week when she'll be only be eating animals she thinks she could have a good conversation with. Celebrities!
• Make and eat this gluten-free, soy-free alfredo sauce from planet delicious. And then also make some for me, too, because I'm a good person, and deserve happiness via alfredo sauce.
• Design a t-shirt for Tofurky and win $1 million. ONE MILLION DOLLARS!
• Rats feel empathy, are kind to their buddies, and are generally better than humans. The fact that we test tons of bullshit things on them makes me want to ring by bell for a shot gun so I can murder everyone. JK, not everyone, I love my dogs.