In the Haight, Score Kombucha SCOBY and Unload Excess Drugs!

A luscious disc of extra-thick SCOBY.
The Onion -- if it has a semblance of a pulse left -- needs to get on the hilarious, phony Craigslist ad tip. Of course, fake ads are unnecessary when the real ones already deliver plenty of laughs. Take, for example, this gem from Monday. "FREE Kombucha SCOBY Mushroom," reads the header. But the kicker is in its two lines of text: "Bring a 1qt GLASS container. Will trade for anything you have in excess." The proposition is intriguing. Anything? Really? Well, in our freezer, we have a softball-sized knob of pot butter the color of a bar of Irish Spring. We were planning to craft some crazy cookies to spoil our holiday office party, but perhaps in lieu of an obvious "anything," the Haight-based poster would accept a few cans of chickpeas, some wilting dill, or the last mushy bits of our Thanksgiving turducken?

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