DRAFT Magazine's Top Ten Beers For Tax Season

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Those lovable, shameless, beer-loving alcoholics responsible drinkers over at DRAFT magazine have done their part to take the nasty edge off of tax day this year (it's next Tuesday slackers) with a list of the top 10 beers suitable for drowning your poverty-stricken, I.R.S.-owing sorrows. So you're broke, so what? Don't do anything you'll regret tomorrow, just drink ten beers or so and try not to get any tears in the glass:

10: Anchor Liberty Ale: Celebrate your freedom to pay the man, or perhaps the unexpected refund you know you deserved all along.

9: Dogfish Head Midas Touch Golden Elixir: You won’t get rich drinking this, but maybe for a little while you can feel like royalty. Then, you can imagine people paying you taxes!

8: Speakeasy Untouchable Pale Ale: Lift a glass up to the revenue men out there who not only tax your income, but those who also regulate beer names and labels.

7: New Belgium La Folie: If you’re going to have a sour face signing that check, you might as well drink a beer that matches your mood. This beer is rich, something we can all appreciate a bit more around this time of year, with a biting sour finish. Sound familiar?

6: Lost Abbey Angel’s Share: We used to call the alcohol that evaporated in barrels “the angel’s share,” but it was a mystery just how much the celestial beings could drink! You may feel the same way about Uncle Sam’s share of your income.

Top five after the jump ... I smell barleywine

5: Sierra Nevada Bigfoot Barleywine-Style Ale: Perhaps because it’s as elusive as your hoped for returns this year, or maybe just because it packs plenty of strength, but this beer just seems right this time of year.

4: Russian River Blind Pig: This piggish IPA won’t leave anywhere near the bitter taste in your mouth as all the government pork you just realized you paid for.

3: Stoudt’s Fat Dog Stout: If you look carefully at the label of this massive working-class beer, you’ll swear you’ve see that face on C-SPAN before—likely to increase beer taxes! No worries; at 9% ABV, you and your favorite Uncle Sam will be chummy in no time.

2: Sam Adams Utopias: There aren’t many beers that you can blow a big chunk of your return on and still feel patriotic now, are there?

1: Abita Turbodog: When you need to associate something less taxing with the word “turbo” than “tax,” this Louisiana brew is ready to help.

It's all in the March/April issue of DRAFT. Check it.

-- B.B.

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