Five Trends that Need to Die in 2013

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Ah, the end of the year. The holidays, the hustle, the bustle, the family gatherings -- and soon enough the ball will drop and then it's time for those pesky new year's resolutions. Most of us will resolve to exercise more, eat less, or quit smoking (really, you still haven't quit smoking?). But today at the Exhibitionist, we would like to recommend a few more things we can all do less in the coming year for the benefit of collective humanity.

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Words That Need to Be Retired in 2013

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We love words! They are our livelihood, and our most cherished resource (aside from food, water, a roof, sex, sunshine, and Nutella), but this doesn't mean we don't know when it's time to move on. The Atlantic has a great list of words that need to be retired in 2013, along with explanations for the haterade (now every other word we use seems retirable!). We agree with most on the list -- "artisinal," "literally," "brogrammer" to name a few -- though we're a little baffled by others -- "quinoa" and "curvy"? C'mon, Atlantic. Or to quote another word they don't like, "really"?!

Here are our contributions to the impending word funeral.

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The Sweet Spot: The Rules Authors Have a New, Terrible Dating Advice Book

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In our increasingly secular society, dogma of all kinds has been losing ground. That is, except when it comes to dating. Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider, authors of The Rules have, since 1995, been claiming that they know the method for nabbing Mr. Right.

Like the priests of romance, they demand faithfulness from their acolytes. Ever unsatisfied, they are continuing to spread word with the upcoming publication of yet another book, Not Your Mother's Rules: The New Secrets for Dating. Whew, just in time, we would have been so lost without their entirely original and groundbreaking advice telling us how to deal with dating now that there is the Internet.

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Video of the Day: Learn to Write from Lemony Snicket

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Meredith Heuer
Lemony Snicket

At author readings, young fiction writers often leave disenchanted, because people are always going on about the book. Who has time to read? You want to know about the writing process, about the physical act of getting the words on the page, specifically that magical quality or thing or bit of advice that will put you the fast-track to Zyzzyva sending you an e-mail for once. Sure, you could go to writing school -- so go there. Tonight, at a bona fide writing class (CW 520, according to the syllabus) taught by an esteemed professor (Robert Glück) at an esteemed school (the S.F. State Creative Writing Department), which is open to the public one night a week. All that's needed is a big-shot author you can machine gun questions at. How about Daniel Handler?

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Five Guidelines for Writing a Screenplay that Doesn't Suck

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Flickr/Zach Klein

By Nate Waggoner

This past two summers, I worked for a company that held a script writing contest, judging amateur screenplays. I spent endless hours in my room and in coffee shops reading hundreds of scripts -- sitcom pilots, spec scripts based on already-existing TV shows, sci-fi, kid's fare, drama, horror, comedy, dramedy, dramuhorrordy, etc. I was fair, tactful, supportive, caffeinated, and bleary-eyed. By the end, I started having trouble distinguishing fantasy from reality, but the experience ultimately made me a more perceptive writer and critic, as well as what NOT to do when trying to get someone to care about your screenplay, whether it's a lowly contest consultant or a Hollywood bigwig.

Here are five guidelines to help aspiring script-writers and contest submitters out there.

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Holiday Gift Guide: 10 Picks from S.F. Booksellers

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Hanna Quevado

New York City might be home to the big houses, but this scrappy city just happens to be the epicenter of publishing on the Best Coast. Join Alexis Coe every Wednesday for Read Local, a series focused on books published in the Bay Area.

San Francisco boasts a delightful array of eclectic bookstores, from indies to worker collectives. One may drastically differ from another in character and focus, but they all have something in common: They love books, so who better to turn to than booksellers for holiday gift recommendations? 10 local bookstores share their picks below.

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How to Survive Renting in San Francisco: Five Rights to Know

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chantel beam photography/Flickr

San Francisco is a crazy sweet place to live, but in a world where you get what you pay for, S.F. renters freaking pay. Out of all of the cities in the entire country (yes, including New York City) San Francisco renters pay the most. We read over at the US Census Bureau that if your rent is half of your income, you're officially poor, or as they put it, "severely burdened." Our self-made certificate of poverty now hangs proudly on our wall.

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Five Reasons You Should Defriend Your Ex on Facebook

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One night in the not so distant past, with the aid of a few beers, I decided to stalk an ex on Facebook. To call her an ex is to use the term liberally -- we didn't have a relationship so much as we had intensity and scarcity, brief encounters of passion followed by months of no contact. We fought terribly and exhaustively, but when it was good, it was really good. It was the kind of relationship I'd never have again, but also one that's stuck with me. "It's been several years," I told myself. "I'll just see what she's up to." When I clicked over, I was startled to find her looking hotter than ever, and immediately looked down at my penguin pajama pants and stained AmeriCorps hoodie in disgust.

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Dating Advice from a Zombie

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Daniel Hollister/Flickr

In the spirit of Halloween, we present to you life advice from a zombie, who may not have all the answers, but he's definitely got the brains.

I used to have the most beautiful girlfriend in the whole world. I feel like I have too high of a standard now with who I choose to date. I've been single for two years. What do I do?

Beauty is important in a relationship because it is what originally attracts us to each other. It can also help keep the flame lit during those rough times (all relationships have them). So physical appearance does have some importance. But honestly, all that really matters is a girl's brains.

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Tags:

dating, sex, zombie

Life Advice from S.F. Street Artist Mike Giant (Video)

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Jonas Normann

World famous for his skateboard graphics, tattooing, graffiti, fine art, and his work with REBEL8, S.F. resident Mike Giant is a living legend. He recently exhibited a collection of old Think graphics and new works for his solo show at Fecal Face Gallery, "Confessions of an Old Dirty Skateboarder" and now he's here to drop some truth bombs on the philosophy of living.

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