What Defines a "Real" Woman? Who Decides? Why Does It Matter? Welcome to Girl Talk

Categories: LGBT, Queer, Talks

A lineup of awesome.
​The physical world loves binaries. Day and night. Life and death. Action and reaction. The social world also loves binaries. If you're not white, then you're black. If you're not straight, that means you're gay. You're born either male or female, and you can't change that. These flavors of intolerance come not only from extreme, "red state" schools of thought, but sometimes from the deepest reaches of our great liberal mecca.

An example? Gender politics. Some queer women who were born female-bodied, for example, overtly reject the idea they share anything with transgender women, tossing around ugly terms such as "bio men" and accusing them of co-opting "real" women's space. Others, however, see gender as a variable and shifting thing, and they embrace the common ground that all queer women share regarding romance, family, friendship, employment, and activism.

It's people from this latter group who organized Girl Talk, Thursday at the the San Francisco LGBT Community Center.

The title alone shows us this camp holds the superior sense of humor.

The annual spoken-word show, in its fourth year, aims to foster and promote dialogue about the various bonds between transgender and so-called "cisgender" women. It's curated by Gina de Vries, Elena Rose, and Julia Serano, all of whom embody some combination of author, performer, activist, and educator. They perform in a lineup that also includes Dominika Bednarska, DavEnd, Thea Hillman, Nomy Lamm, Emily Manuel, Jos Truitt, and Pidge Vera.

We support this kind of dialogue, believing that we Left Coast oddballs should embrace each other in all our differences. Consider the battles that could be in our near future -- one of them is named Rick Santorum.

Girl Talk starts at 7 p.m. Thursday (March 29) at the San Francisco LGBT Community Center, 1800 Market (at Octavia), S.F. Admission is $12-$20.

For more events in San Francisco this week and beyond, check out our calendar section. Follow us on Twitter at @ExhibitionistSF and like us on Facebook.

Location Info



San Francisco LGBT Community Center

1800 Market, San Francisco, CA

Category: General

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 "Never kick a man when he is down." That saying can sum up some of the mixed reactions I felt while reading the blurb for Girl Talk, which was supposed to compel me??? to pay 20$ to attend another shaming? Is it possible to find self affirmation without pointing fingers? I forget that the act of shaming in the Bay area can be an erotic experience for some, which is why I have made it a point to not be present in this dialogue - especially if people feel entitled to try and force me to have them for whatever some reason people can justify. One of the things that I had to get over to keep me from shitting and pissing my pants in public,was to learn how to manage that that tension my ambiguous presence brought forth in the ladies room. Once I took the time to exam WHY, it kept me from internalizing that negativity that has been surrounding women's issues. First I am bashed for being lesbian, then for loving bisexual women and now, because I came to terms with my imperfect body, mind, spirit and emotions my parents gave me? Because I can't relate to those that have not or will not do that for themselves?  Whatever happen to the harm reduction philosophy this city was known for? You know, accepting people for where they are at and without judgement. Whether it is a valid defense mechanism or unexplainable- it is just a woman simply following her intuition... whatever influences her choices, I think that those choices should be respected. Identifying as a feminist doesn't buy anyone any "rights" into someone's head space, being born female sure as hell didn't/doesn't reserve any rights into straight, queer or even into the lives of gay women I don't know or even the ones I do know.  I never thought it could or should.  My advice to other women who are struggling with the rejection they feel coming from other women: Please stay focused on the love and acceptance you have, not on what you don't have.My advice to straight/queer/gay women conflicted about this topic in general: Take all the time and space you need to heal and/or to form your own opinions to make those informed decisions.Homospicious 

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