What Defines a "Real" Woman? Who Decides? Why Does It Matter? Welcome to Girl Talk

 "Never kick a man when he is down." That saying can sum up some of the mixed reactions I felt while reading the blurb for Girl Talk, which was supposed to compel me??? to pay 20$ to attend another shaming? Is it possible to find self affirmation without pointing fingers? I forget that the act of shaming in the Bay area can be an erotic experience for some, which is why I have made it a point to not be present in this dialogue - especially if people feel entitled to try and force me to have them for whatever some reason people can justify. One of the things that I had to get over to keep me from shitting and pissing my pants in public,was to learn how to manage that that tension my ambiguous presence brought forth in the ladies room. Once I took the time to exam WHY, it kept me from internalizing that negativity that has been surrounding women's issues. First I am bashed for being lesbian, then for loving bisexual women and now, because I came to terms with my imperfect body, mind, spirit and emotions my parents gave me? Because I can't relate to those that have not or will not do that for themselves?  Whatever happen to the harm reduction philosophy this city was known for? You know, accepting people for where they are at and without judgement. Whether it is a valid defense mechanism or unexplainable- it is just a woman simply following her intuition... whatever influences her choices, I think that those choices should be respected. Identifying as a feminist doesn't buy anyone any "rights" into someone's head space, being born female sure as hell didn't/doesn't reserve any rights into straight, queer or even into the lives of gay women I don't know or even the ones I do know.  I never thought it could or should.  My advice to other women who are struggling with the rejection they feel coming from other women: Please stay focused on the love and acceptance you have, not on what you don't have.My advice to straight/queer/gay women conflicted about this topic in general: Take all the time and space you need to heal and/or to form your own opinions to make those informed decisions.Homospicious