The Sweet Spot: Why Women Love Watching Gay Male Porn

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​In the film The Kids Are All Right, in one scene the main characters, a lesbian couple, break out their queer porn stash to get themselves in the mood to get down. Lesbians watching porn might not seem unusual -- until it is revealed that it is man-on-man gay porn.

What? Oh yes. A little-known fact is that quite a few gay, bi, and straight women are turning to the excitement of hot man sex for their viewing pleasure.

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​Cornelius Conboy, formerly with Falcon Studios, one of the leading production companies of male-on-male porn, says, "It's always been an open secret that a lot of regular consumers of gay porn are women. Dykes particularly."

So what is this all about?

The simplest reason is that many women are turned off by how fake a lot of straight porn is.

"With gay male porn, the actors look like they're having fun and enjoying sex," one commenter wrote on Grace the Spot, a site that deals in lesbian entertainment, culture, and humor. "With all other types of porn, more often than not, it looks contrived, overacted, unbelievable, ridiculous, or just plain unfun."

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​Frank, direct, good fucking is a large part of the appeal. But a lot of women also like gay male porn purely because we are turned on by hot men. In gay porn, there are all sorts of types to satisfy any taste. Pretty boys, buff boys, leather daddies, and all kinds of other man flavors are boldly laid out for us to enjoy.

I will totally admit to having a thing for gay men. I love them. However, I am not their type. This attraction of mine could be a manifestation of my attraction to men who are not interested in me. But isn't it true that often our sexual proclivities are directly inspired by our issues? Watching men enjoy each other allows me to enjoy the fantasy of being part of the play and simultaneously allows me to delight in not being involved at all.

Voyeurism, neurotic fulfillment, and hotness all at once. Who could ask for more?

Michele Rider, a local photographer and lesbian, also likes the possibility of fantasy.

"I like watching gay porn because there is an element of gender exploration and fun fantasy," she says. "I get to imagine how the other half lives."

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Michele Rider
​These are all fun reasons to watch boys play, but Rose Anderson, a fashion designer and mother, likes gay porn because it is hard for her to dismiss ideas of exploitation while watching straight porn. By watching gay action, she feels like she can be socially conscious and lustful at the same time.

"I don't get the sense that the actors in gay porn would rather be doing something else," she says. "I can't help but worry about why those women have turned to porn to make money. Were they abused? Are they poverty stricken? Are they on drugs? Were they just young and naive and pushed into it?"

Obviously, all forms of pornography have the potential to be exploitative, and these questions could equally apply to male actors in the business. But for Anderson and many other women, the still too-rampant sexual abuse of women inhibits their enjoyment of straight porn.

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Sadie Smythe
​In the end, we don't really need to explain why something turns us on. Sadie Smythe, author of Open All the Way, says as much when talking about why she loves guy-on-guy porn.

"It's not something I can explain; it just is what it is," she says. "I liken it to the reason that hetero men like girl-on-girl porn so much, because chicks get their dicks hard. Men are my weakness, they are the erotic rousers, the lowdown teasers, the totally torrid trippers of my brain's pleasure centers."

What arouses us defies all gender roles, political alliances, and moral codes. What we do in our physical life may be tame or consciously aligned with these concerns. But our erotic imaginations are free to explore all manner of titillations, be they queer, straight, violent, silly, or genuinely strange.

The beauty of erotic imagery is that it's transcendent -- a medium through which we taste what freedom feels like.

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The Sweet Spot is a weekly blog column about alternative sexuality by Ginger Murray. Check back next week for more.

Follow us on Twitter at @ExhibitionistSF and like us on Facebook.

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17 comments
amdtrims
amdtrims

amdtrims@gmail.com

you pricks all deserve to die you bumfucking shit rodd sucking dcum

guest02
guest02

thank you for the article i thought i was the only one in this world with this fantasy ;) i feel un guilty now lol 

Clinton_Hill_Cutie
Clinton_Hill_Cutie

"One of the reasons why I didn't feel bad watching gay porn is the equalizer factor. From a physical point of view, two adult guys are more on an equal footing"

^^This is EXACTLY why straight women like gay porn. I've completely turned off straight porn because its only filmed for the pleasure of men. Women's desires are completely disregarded in straight porn. 

Vjammiez
Vjammiez

Here's another simple little reason why I find myself watching gay porn; men have faces!! In straight porn men are shot from the belly button down and it's nice to see their whole bodies.

Mark
Mark

I'm Gay. I never could even get a woman for a coffee date. Yet they say what a great guy I am and would be a good husband. But like the thought women would think me sweet kissing and being caressed by another man. Cute while giving oral sex or receiving anal. And absolutely precious the delightful look on my face when he came in my mouth.  I would let them watch me and my boyfriend any time.  Cot a dumped boyfriend or ex husband, i would enjoy turning him Gay too. Undoubtedly deserving as I'm sure you know he should never be allowed to harm another woman.

mYtY
mYtY

I'm a straight, married women who LOVES Gay porn (RandyBlue.com...hello!!!) I can't stand watching Hetro porn which is mainly made for men to watch. I can't the overly done up, inflated women in them. I will never go back to it. And I'm completely addicted to reading m/m romance/erotica as well.

Soaringsoul
Soaringsoul

I love the thought of a woman getting wet watching me suck another man, ive never been with another man but thats a whole other fantasy! Hahaha

gddss136
gddss136

First of all, I am so happy I stumbled upon this article. I'm so glad that someone wrote about this subject. I cannot agree more with the lines and I quote: "I can't help but worry about why those women have turned to porn to make money. Were they abused? Are they poverty stricken? Are they on drugs? Were they just young and naive and pushed into it?"

When I checked out a couple of straight porn videos that was exactly my feeling. I just couldn't enjoy them at all because it thoroughly seemed to me that it promoted the idea that women are simply there as pleasing objects, and their own pleasure should come from pleasing the male/males in complete abnegation of their own desires. I understand this is what they are paid to do, but I don't have the feeling that they enjoy it at all, rather, while the 20 inch penis is going down their throats, all they seem to think about is the thousands of dollars they get for humiliating themselves this way. It's like these women are telling to themselves "this only lasts 30 minutes, while the money I get from it will pay the rent, food, and all living costs." And I don't blame them. It's hard for me to imagine any woman who has an itty-bitty self esteem going into this line of work because they enjoy it. Economic reasons play the biggest part for choosing a career in porn. And I don't care what the female porn stars declare publicly of how thrilled they are doing this. After all what are they suppose to say "I really hate it, I'm doing it only for the money?". Part of their allure is to keep up the fantasy in the male viewership's imagination that doing porn is something they enjoy, and they simply combine business with pleasure. Coming clean would badly hurt their career, if their desire is to pursue it longer.

On the other hand, when I checked out gay male porn, I didn't have these feelings at all. One of the reasons why I didn't feel bad watching gay porn is the equalizer factor. From a physical point of view, two adult guys are more on an equal footing, and the chance of sexual abuse or one exploiting the other is not that prevalent. On the other hand when I see straight porn, I can't help myself wondering if she was forced to do that. Just to give you an example, Linda Lovelace, the protagonist of the infamous porn movie "Deep Throat", the movie that started it all, later came out and said that she was physically abused and shot those scenes under threats from her husband. You can even see the bruises on her body during the movie.

I enjoy gay porn because of the kinky feelings that arise from seeing two guys doing it, and also because as the article mentioned I feel socially conscious and lustful at the same time. And please don't attack me, calling me names and stuff. This is my opinion and a few friends of mines with whom I discussed this issue with.

Guest
Guest

A huge (ahem) reason you left out:  Straight women like cock. Gay porn has loads) of it. Hetero porn focuses on the woman.

Samantha Leitner
Samantha Leitner

 Good article!  But saying that "Hetero-porn" is somehow exploitative is hogwash.  Most of porn's successful females express a deep enjoyment for the business.  I know it's very "90's feminist" to project feelings of exploitation on those who do not necessarily feel exploited..... but from the porn starlets i have befriended over the years, they definitely don't feel exploited.  Especially their bank accounts

GGGirl
GGGirl

@Clinton_Hill_Cutie Whereas gay male porn is made for... lol

RyanJohnSmith
RyanJohnSmith

Do you know how much drug abuse and debasement goes on in geigh porn ? A lot.

Miles K Stenehjem
Miles K Stenehjem

What we're pointing to when we say "I feel less guilty when I watch gay porn" might not be related to the idea that it's less exploitative but instead it may just be that we don't feel as bad when these things happen to males.

Ginger Murray
Ginger Murray

Hi Samantha, thanks for writing. And indeed, I entirely agree with you. I wrote another article a few weeks ago celebrating certain forms of hetero porn and the women who star in the films. Cheers. 

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